Asked my wife if I was the only one she’s even been with.
“Yes” she said, “all the others were 9s and 10s.”
Jokes Thread
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weeksy
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weeksy
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Re: Jokes Thread
Female weightlifter goes to see a doctor
FW – I think I’ve been overdoing the steroids, I’ve grown a knob.
D – Anabolic?
FW – No, just a knob.
FW – I think I’ve been overdoing the steroids, I’ve grown a knob.
D – Anabolic?
FW – No, just a knob.
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Saga Lout
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Re: Jokes Thread
That reminds me.weeksy wrote: Tue Jan 25, 2022 7:29 am I’ve just tried some of Elvis Costello’s Mediterranean sausage range from Waitrose.
I must say it was lovely, I think Olive salami is here to stay
See you in the insignificcant BYP thread.
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Taipan
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Re: Jokes Thread
A mixed race Gentleman walked into a bar. At least, that's the Met Police's version of events...
NC750X mpg 
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Taipan
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Taipan
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Taipan
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Count Steer
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Re: Jokes Thread
Surgeon: Right John, it's just a small operation. Nothing to worry about.
Patient: My names not John.
Surgeon: No, I'm John.
Patient: My names not John.
Surgeon: No, I'm John.
The plural of 'anecdote' is not 'data'.
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Saga Lout
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Re: Jokes Thread
I went to see my GP:
“Doctor, I need to lose some weight”
“Don’t eat anything fatty.”
“You mean cut down on the fry-ups, eat fewer chips?”
“No, you weren’t listening. I said don’t eat anything, Fatty.”
“Doctor, I need to lose some weight”
“Don’t eat anything fatty.”
“You mean cut down on the fry-ups, eat fewer chips?”
“No, you weren’t listening. I said don’t eat anything, Fatty.”
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Taipan
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DW.
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Re: Jokes Thread
We call them Bogans, but same same. What is the pommy version of redneck?
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Known as 10 second Tommy (which has nothing to do with drag racing)
Also 2 stroke Tommy (which has nothing to do with motorcycles)
Also 2 stroke Tommy (which has nothing to do with motorcycles)
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Yambo
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Re: Jokes Thread
DW. wrote: Sat Jan 29, 2022 1:35 pm We call them Bogans, but same same. What is the pommy version of redneck?
Yorkshiremen.
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slowsider
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DW.
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Re: Jokes Thread
Well that doesn't sound very offensive at all or is that like the most offensive thing a person could be called??
Known as 10 second Tommy (which has nothing to do with drag racing)
Also 2 stroke Tommy (which has nothing to do with motorcycles)
Also 2 stroke Tommy (which has nothing to do with motorcycles)
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Count Steer
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Re: Jokes Thread
Stannah now have a turbo stairlift. It's so fast it gets you upstairs before you've forgotten what you were going for. 
The plural of 'anecdote' is not 'data'.
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Saga Lout
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Re: Jokes Thread
I think he would have known. Here's just one prior example of it being common knowledge:
"Thus hath the candle singd the moath." Shakespeare The Merchant of Venice, 1596
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slowsider
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