Jokes Thread

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Taipan
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Re: Jokes Thread

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The In-Laws came for dinner last night. M-i-L said why does the dog keep staring at me?
I replied, it because you've got his plate...
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Saw my mate Steve yesterday. He lost an arm in an accident and I asked where he was off too?
"Going to change a lightbulb" he said
I laughed at him and said "Good luck with that lol"
"I'll be fine" he replied "I've got the receipt you cheeky twat"!
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Re: Jokes Thread

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I asked my parents what they did to fight boredom before they had televisions and they said they didn't know. I asked my 18 brothers and sisters and they didn't know either.
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Re: Jokes Thread

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Taipan wrote: Wed Oct 30, 2024 11:00 am
You know, you can't quite tell if things like that are a joke, but that's Olivia Coleman on the left I think, so it must be.
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Re: Jokes Thread

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McNab wrote: Wed Oct 30, 2024 12:10 pm
Taipan wrote: Wed Oct 30, 2024 11:00 am
You know, you can't quite tell if things like that are a joke, but that's Olivia Coleman on the left I think, so it must be.
Yes, its very Harry Enfield and the other lady looks like she has Tim-nice-but-dim's teeth in! :D
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Re: Jokes Thread

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:think:
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Re: Jokes Thread

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[x] Should be in politics area

.
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Even bland can be a type of character :wave:
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Re: Jokes Thread

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Re: Jokes Thread

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Halloween joke!

Why don't WItches use dating apps?



Because their ancestors had bad experiences with matches on Tinder!
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Re: Jokes Thread

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Not saying my wife is ugly but she went next door to tell the neighbours to turn their music off.....
And come back with two packets of haribo.
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Re: Jokes Thread

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:?

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Re: Jokes Thread

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Just been to a meeting and a guy introduced himself to me as Jathan. FFS not Jason or Nathan, no his parents bastardised it to Jathan! So I said, Jathan! Interesting name you have there!
He said Are you being therious!
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Taipan wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2024 12:46 pm Just been to a meeting and a guy introduced himself to me as Jathan. FFS not Jason or Nathan, no his parents bastardised it to Jathan! So I said, Jathan! Interesting name you have there!
He said Are you being therious!
Doctor. Big breaths.

Girl . Yeth and I'm only thixteen.
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