Jokes Thread
-
Taipan
- Posts: 13970
- Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 1:48 pm
- Location: Essex Riviera!
- Has thanked: 15982 times
- Been thanked: 10259 times
Re: Jokes Thread
Apparently, people used to tie lamps to horses so they could find their way in the dark. It's the earliest known form of saddle light navigation.
-
DefTrap
- Posts: 4504
- Joined: Tue Apr 14, 2020 8:23 am
- Has thanked: 2267 times
- Been thanked: 2193 times
Re: Jokes Thread
Edinburgh Fringe is apparently a way in to the lucrative Christmas-Cracker-joke-writing racket. Bring back Alternative Comedy.Felix wrote: ↑Tue Aug 22, 2023 8:13 am FFS a 70's joke wins best joke
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland- ... e-66569215
-
gremlin
- Posts: 5930
- Joined: Wed Jul 08, 2020 3:12 pm
- Location: Kent (AKA God's own country)
- Has thanked: 810 times
- Been thanked: 4806 times
Re: Jokes Thread
I made a Belgian waffle this morning.
And Frenchman talk utter bollocks this afternoon.
I'll get my fringe coat....
And Frenchman talk utter bollocks this afternoon.
I'll get my fringe coat....
All aboard the Peckham Pigeon! All aboard!
-
Trinity765
- Posts: 2321
- Joined: Fri Nov 06, 2020 2:27 pm
- Location: Brighton
- Has thanked: 2442 times
- Been thanked: 2398 times
-
Dodgy69
- Posts: 5470
- Joined: Mon Mar 16, 2020 6:36 pm
- Location: Shrewsbury
- Has thanked: 1751 times
- Been thanked: 2086 times
-
Demannu
- Posts: 1882
- Joined: Sat May 08, 2021 5:14 pm
- Location: Another day without using algebra
- Has thanked: 65 times
- Been thanked: 1235 times
-
Horse
- Posts: 11563
- Joined: Sun Mar 15, 2020 11:30 am
- Location: Always sunny southern England
- Has thanked: 6200 times
- Been thanked: 5090 times
-
Demannu
- Posts: 1882
- Joined: Sat May 08, 2021 5:14 pm
- Location: Another day without using algebra
- Has thanked: 65 times
- Been thanked: 1235 times
-
Horse
- Posts: 11563
- Joined: Sun Mar 15, 2020 11:30 am
- Location: Always sunny southern England
- Has thanked: 6200 times
- Been thanked: 5090 times
-
KungFooBob
- Posts: 14223
- Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 1:04 pm
- Location: The content of this post is not AI generated.
- Has thanked: 539 times
- Been thanked: 7539 times
Re: Jokes Thread
What do you call a sheep tied to a post in Wales... a leisure centre.
- Attachments
-
- 370903313_10225790121432793_8152268477694450257_n.jpg (34.41 KiB) Viewed 839 times
-
Demannu
- Posts: 1882
- Joined: Sat May 08, 2021 5:14 pm
- Location: Another day without using algebra
- Has thanked: 65 times
- Been thanked: 1235 times
-
KungFooBob
- Posts: 14223
- Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 1:04 pm
- Location: The content of this post is not AI generated.
- Has thanked: 539 times
- Been thanked: 7539 times
Re: Jokes Thread
I'm not one for posting serious stuff, but now more than ever I need your advice. I have suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs, the phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up.Also very secretive with her mobile , always texting etc
My wife has been going out with 'the girls' a lot recently although when I ask their names she always says, 'Just some friends from work, you don't know them.' I always try to stay awake to look out for her coming home, but I usually fall asleep.
Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife. I think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to really check on her. Around midnight, I decided to hide in the garage behind my motorbike so I could get a good view of the whole street when she arrived home from a night out with 'the girls'. When she got out of the car she was buttoning up her blouse, which was open, and she took her panties out of her purse and slipped them on.
It was at that moment, crouching behind my motorbike that I noticed it has a hairline crack where the fairing meets the tank
Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to the shop where I bought it?
TIA
My wife has been going out with 'the girls' a lot recently although when I ask their names she always says, 'Just some friends from work, you don't know them.' I always try to stay awake to look out for her coming home, but I usually fall asleep.
Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife. I think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to really check on her. Around midnight, I decided to hide in the garage behind my motorbike so I could get a good view of the whole street when she arrived home from a night out with 'the girls'. When she got out of the car she was buttoning up her blouse, which was open, and she took her panties out of her purse and slipped them on.
It was at that moment, crouching behind my motorbike that I noticed it has a hairline crack where the fairing meets the tank
Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to the shop where I bought it?
TIA
-
Horse
- Posts: 11563
- Joined: Sun Mar 15, 2020 11:30 am
- Location: Always sunny southern England
- Has thanked: 6200 times
- Been thanked: 5090 times
Re: Jokes Thread
- 370605141_9896821303726500_6865075028129408277_n.jpg (28.18 KiB) Viewed 757 times
Even bland can be a type of character 
-
Horse
- Posts: 11563
- Joined: Sun Mar 15, 2020 11:30 am
- Location: Always sunny southern England
- Has thanked: 6200 times
- Been thanked: 5090 times
Re: Jokes Thread
Ikea dog kit assembly *fail*
- 20230829_123900.jpg (269.24 KiB) Viewed 720 times
Even bland can be a type of character
-
weeksy
- Site Admin
- Posts: 23432
- Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 12:08 pm
- Has thanked: 5455 times
- Been thanked: 13102 times
-
weeksy
- Site Admin
- Posts: 23432
- Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 12:08 pm
- Has thanked: 5455 times
- Been thanked: 13102 times
-
Taipan
- Posts: 13970
- Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 1:48 pm
- Location: Essex Riviera!
- Has thanked: 15982 times
- Been thanked: 10259 times
-
Taipan
- Posts: 13970
- Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 1:48 pm
- Location: Essex Riviera!
- Has thanked: 15982 times
- Been thanked: 10259 times
Re: Jokes Thread
My wife just accused me of never taking notice of her and buying her flowers. She has a point as I never even knew she sold flowers!