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Jokes Thread
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Horse
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Dodgy69
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cheb
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Re: Jokes Thread
They missed off 'Mr. "You're Wrong"'.
He says from Harrogate, Nice place, but for the surrounding county. If only they could move it south west a bit, maybe down near Bristol.
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Taipan
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Re: Jokes Thread
Yorick and his Mrs walked past a new restaurant that had just opened. Yorick's Mrs remarked how nice the food smelt. Being a kind-hearted Yorkshirman Yorick thought, "What the hell, i'll treat our lass", and he walked her past it again!
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Yorick
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Re: Jokes Thread
Taipan wrote: Fri Aug 11, 2023 3:37 pm Yorick and his Mrs walked past a new restaurant that had just opened. Yorick's Mrs remarked how nice the food smelt. Being a kind-hearted Yorkshirman Yorick thought, "What the hell, i'll treat our lass", and he walked her past it again!
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Demannu
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Re: Jokes Thread
How was it in jail son?
Asked his concerned mother
I was raped!
Said her son, sobbing.
Well, Uncle Gerald does take monopoly seriously!
Asked his concerned mother
I was raped!
Said her son, sobbing.
Well, Uncle Gerald does take monopoly seriously!
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Yorick
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Re: Jokes Thread
Morris an 84 year old man went to his doctor to get a physical.
A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a beautiful young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later , the doctor saw Morris again for a follow up and said You're doing great aren't you?
Morris replied just following your instruction doc to get a hot momma and be cheerful.
I didn't say that, I said you have a heart murmur and be careful..
A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a beautiful young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later , the doctor saw Morris again for a follow up and said You're doing great aren't you?
Morris replied just following your instruction doc to get a hot momma and be cheerful.
I didn't say that, I said you have a heart murmur and be careful..
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MrLongbeard
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Yorick
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Demannu
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Horse
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gremlin
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Re: Jokes Thread
Mrs. Gremlin just stopped and said to me, 'You weren't even listening to me, were you?'
I thought to myself, 'That's a pretty funny way to start off a conversation'.
I thought to myself, 'That's a pretty funny way to start off a conversation'.
Remember Anne Diamond!
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Taipan
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Re: Jokes Thread
I spotted an albino Dalmatian the other day. I thought it was the least I could do...
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Felix
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Taipan
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Re: Jokes Thread
Apparently, people used to tie lamps to horses so they could find their way in the dark. It's the earliest known form of saddle light navigation.
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DefTrap
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Re: Jokes Thread
Edinburgh Fringe is apparently a way in to the lucrative Christmas-Cracker-joke-writing racket. Bring back Alternative Comedy.Felix wrote: Tue Aug 22, 2023 8:13 am FFS a 70's joke wins best joke
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland- ... e-66569215
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gremlin
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Re: Jokes Thread
I made a Belgian waffle this morning.
And Frenchman talk utter bollocks this afternoon.
I'll get my fringe coat....
And Frenchman talk utter bollocks this afternoon.
I'll get my fringe coat....
Remember Anne Diamond!
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Trinity765
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