Jokes Thread
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Taipan
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Re: Jokes Thread
I just saw a picture of me and realised how much weight i'd put on and that I needed to do something about it quickly! So I rang weightwatchers and said it's an emergency, can you send someone round? They said yes, we have loads of them...
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Horse
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Re: Jokes Thread
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Even bland can be a type of character 
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Horse
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Re: Jokes Thread
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Even bland can be a type of character
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Horse
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Re: Jokes Thread
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Even bland can be a type of character
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Dodgy69
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cheb
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Re: Jokes Thread
They missed off 'Mr. "You're Wrong"'.
He says from Harrogate, Nice place, but for the surrounding county. If only they could move it south west a bit, maybe down near Bristol.
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Taipan
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Re: Jokes Thread
Yorick and his Mrs walked past a new restaurant that had just opened. Yorick's Mrs remarked how nice the food smelt. Being a kind-hearted Yorkshirman Yorick thought, "What the hell, i'll treat our lass", and he walked her past it again!
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Yorick
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Demannu
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Re: Jokes Thread
How was it in jail son?
Asked his concerned mother
I was raped!
Said her son, sobbing.
Well, Uncle Gerald does take monopoly seriously!
Asked his concerned mother
I was raped!
Said her son, sobbing.
Well, Uncle Gerald does take monopoly seriously!
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Yorick
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Re: Jokes Thread
Morris an 84 year old man went to his doctor to get a physical.
A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a beautiful young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later , the doctor saw Morris again for a follow up and said You're doing great aren't you?
Morris replied just following your instruction doc to get a hot momma and be cheerful.
I didn't say that, I said you have a heart murmur and be careful..
A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a beautiful young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later , the doctor saw Morris again for a follow up and said You're doing great aren't you?
Morris replied just following your instruction doc to get a hot momma and be cheerful.
I didn't say that, I said you have a heart murmur and be careful..
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MrLongbeard
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Yorick
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Demannu
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Horse
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gremlin
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Re: Jokes Thread
Mrs. Gremlin just stopped and said to me, 'You weren't even listening to me, were you?'
I thought to myself, 'That's a pretty funny way to start off a conversation'.
I thought to myself, 'That's a pretty funny way to start off a conversation'.
All aboard the Peckham Pigeon! All aboard!
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Taipan
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Re: Jokes Thread
I spotted an albino Dalmatian the other day. I thought it was the least I could do...
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Felix
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