Depression

[Docca]

Happiness can come from many different things, it's a relative concept.

Happiness can certainly come from material things just as it can come from ideas and achievements. All you need is a change from being unhappy. Many different things can bring that about.

Perhaps a better word then would be contentment or fulfilment?
IME lasting contentment doesn't come from material things because you just move on to the next shiny thing, it comes from feeling like you're achieving some degree of success in whatever you put your mind to, even if it's just tidying up the house or digging the garden, you have to go to bed feeling like you got something done.

I reckon this is spot on, I spend all day in my office and whilst it earns money it’s not exactly satisfying. In our yard there’s a company that builds overland campers. They are doing an ex military unimog and it’s looking great, they had some issues with the wiring so I went over for a couple of hours with my multimeter and sorted it out. I was happier that day and felt I’d achieved something.

You must have been ecstatic coming down and seeing the wiring in my house then buddy


( your point and Potters are spot on IME too).

[Couchy]

Perhaps a better word then would be contentment or fulfilment?
IME lasting contentment doesn't come from material things because you just move on to the next shiny thing, it comes from feeling like you're achieving some degree of success in whatever you put your mind to, even if it's just tidying up the house or digging the garden, you have to go to bed feeling like you got something done.

I reckon this is spot on, I spend all day in my office and whilst it earns money it’s not exactly satisfying. In our yard there’s a company that builds overland campers. They are doing an ex military unimog and it’s looking great, they had some issues with the wiring so I went over for a couple of hours with my multimeter and sorted it out. I was happier that day and felt I’d achieved something.

You must have been ecstatic coming down and seeing the wiring in my house then buddy


( your point and Potters are spot on IME too).

Finding what was wrong was indeed very enjoyable, tbh I think any issues I have these days are because I don’t do enough ‘real’ work

[Count Steer]

Agree with the satisfaction of 'getting something done'.

Health is a big factor too. When you've had days where waking up and going 'Woohoo! Still alive' and going to bed saying ''Survived again ' are the days high points it changes your perspective on the joys of owning 'stuff'.

[Docca]

Not sure if I’ve posted this before, but might be useful to some

[Yambo]

Not sure if I’ve posted this before, but might be useful to some

Which one is produced by checking your 'Likes' on social media?

[Noggin]

I showed them to the special needs teacher. She took one look at them and guess what she said.

More to follow

Something about being either on the edge of 'the spectrum' or that she's not a happy kid?

[Taipan]

Agree with the satisfaction of 'getting something done'.

Health is a big factor too. When you've had days where waking up and going 'Woohoo! Still alive' and going to bed saying ''Survived again ' are the days high points it changes your perspective on the joys of owning 'stuff'.

Having spent the last 5 years suffering varying levels of pain, but always in it, I have to say at times its pretty hard to be chipper!

[Noggin]

Agree with the satisfaction of 'getting something done'.

Health is a big factor too. When you've had days where waking up and going 'Woohoo! Still alive' and going to bed saying ''Survived again ' are the days high points it changes your perspective on the joys of owning 'stuff'.

Having spent the last 5 years suffering varying levels of pain, but always in it, I have to say at times its pretty hard to be chipper!

100%.

People over here (and on FB) often say to me that I'm brave because I paste on a smile and keep on going in a positive manner.

But to me, there is no choice, so how is that brave (or inspirational is another). Just because I write/talk/seem positive, its FUCKING hard to put that smile on and seem that way. And in that, there is another straw that could tip a person over because just having to try that hard to 'seem' ok is very challenging!

I consider that I had no choice. Like Taipan, I had 5 years or so of pain, and disappointment, surgeries, knock backs etc. I'm not brave (or inspirational) - I had no choice but to pretend because I did that or I quit. Quitting seemed a bit too terminal for the sake of pretending and waiting a bit longer (and a bit longer again, and again!)

I'd go to bed with the thought of "survived again - FFS got to do that again tomorrow" - not much positive or to look forward to there!!

[Count Steer]

Agree with the satisfaction of 'getting something done'.

Health is a big factor too. When you've had days where waking up and going 'Woohoo! Still alive' and going to bed saying ''Survived again ' are the days high points it changes your perspective on the joys of owning 'stuff'.

Having spent the last 5 years suffering varying levels of pain, but always in it, I have to say at times its pretty hard to be chipper!

Yeah, I'm with you there although pain is a bit different from what I was thinking of up there^.

The thing I found with chronic pain wasn't just the pain it was lack of sleep. Like, every time you move you go Ow! and wake up. Eventually ie over a year*, the sleep deprivation does really unpleasant things to your head. Chipper doesn't come into it, I was slowly going tornado.

* I fell through a crack in the total perspective vortex when they ripped out the old IT system and put in a new one - which cost me an extra few months.

[Taipan]

Agree with the satisfaction of 'getting something done'.

Health is a big factor too. When you've had days where waking up and going 'Woohoo! Still alive' and going to bed saying ''Survived again ' are the days high points it changes your perspective on the joys of owning 'stuff'.

Having spent the last 5 years suffering varying levels of pain, but always in it, I have to say at times its pretty hard to be chipper!

Yeah, I'm with you there although pain is a bit different from what I was thinking of up there^.

The thing I found with chronic pain wasn't just the pain it was lack of sleep. Like, every time you move you go Ow! and wake up. Eventually ie over a year*, the sleep deprivation does really unpleasant things to your head. Chipper doesn't come into it, I was slowly going tornado.

* I fell through a crack in the total perspective vortex when they ripped out the old IT system and put in a new one - which cost me an extra few months.

Yes, sleep deprivation for the reasons you mention is a massive part of my life. I often sleep in my office at lunchtime, because I literally can't keep awake lol! Also because I have to, as I lose focus on what i'm doing. I know what I need to do, but can't process the action. Its beyond infuriating!

The pain I can normally manage, but at times it gets unbearable, not always because of its intensity, but because of its constant encroachment into my life. It does lead you down dark alleys as you get so fed up with enduring it. Thank God for meds!

[Noggin]

Thank God for meds!

If/when I find some that actually make any real difference to me, I'll be thanking every deity (and scientist!) I can think of!!!

Luckily I don't really need much in the way of meds now and due to lack of anything that actually worked, I'm pretty used to a level of pain as normal. I'm getting towards the normal that is what others seem to experience now (little to no pain) but bloody hell the last five years have been a challenge - not least because medics across the board just don't believe me when I say that codeine, tramadol and morphine have little to no effect on pain levels (and don't space me out to help me not care )

But when it was bad (about four years!) that was not good at all. If i'd have had one of those comfy chairs that lie back a bit and have a foot/leg support, that would have been handy!!

[Mussels]

I showed them to the special needs teacher. She took one look at them and guess what she said.

More to follow

Something about being either on the edge of 'the spectrum' or that she's not a happy kid?

Lonely comes to mind as well.
If she is on the spectrum then it helps you to know and deal with it, has anyone spoken to the school about it?

[Wscad]

The teacher said the teen needs assessing for autism by a professional. Wife mention this to teens father and says “ nothing wrong with my daughter “

[Cousin Jack]

The teacher said the teen needs assessing for autism by a professional. Wife mention this to teens father and says “ nothing wrong with my daughter “

Seems to me that you and your wife know said teen better than her father does.

[Mussels]

The teacher said the teen needs assessing for autism by a professional. Wife mention this to teens father and says “ nothing wrong with my daughter “

Tell father his daughter needs a security guard to follow her, then hire an autism nurse.

[Noggin]

The teacher said the teen needs assessing for autism by a professional. Wife mention this to teens father and says “ nothing wrong with my daughter “

FFS. People are so worried of judgement and difference that they forget the human being involved

It could be a combination of things showing up as similar symptoms. And autism isn't the horrendous label it used to be

Don't suppose I should say this, but can the father be bypassed and the school talked to??


She might just be lonely and depressed - I went to a boarding school (as a day pupil) and it seemed then to be a challenging life for some. Of at school and barely seeing parents. You guys are family, but she will miss her parents I'd guess

Doesn't make it any easier for you or her xxx

[Buckaroo]

I'd say you're absolutely right. Happiness does not come from material stuff, having a big house, loads of spare cash to buy whatever nonsense you want. People might say it helps, or that they couldn't do a certain lifestyle without it, but when you strip it back the happiness isn't about that at all. Depression effects everyone, from millionaires to the working man.
[/quote]

Happiness doesn't come from material stuff (although it helps having a nice house where the sun shines every morning).

Happiness comes from feeling like you're getting somewhere, call it satisfaction, call it success, whatever, but if you feel like you're making a bit of progress in whatever you set yourself to, then you're going to feel fulfilled to whatever degree. If you go to bed every night feeling like you've wasted your time even getting out of bed that morning, then it has the opposite effect.

These comments have reminded me of the value in Maslows hierarchy of needs.

In an easy to remember format: To live, to love, to learn, to leave a legacy.

Live: we need a safe place to shelter and food to eat.
Love: we are social animals that need to give and receive love
Learn:to acquire skills, improve knowledge and grow as a person
Leave a legacy: you have contributed and have left your mark. Your life had meaning.

If you look at others and of course, yourself, it's interesting to assess how each level is or has been achieved or perhaps exceeded. It can explain why we feel the way we do.

Well, at any rate, I find this and similar theories or models of interest and use.

[Wscad]

Watching autumn watch this evening. Sitting outside and listening,watching birds will improve your well being and mental health. This weekends project is to throw some sand down in the greenhouse, deckchair inside and hankie with a knot in each corner on me head.

I’ll let you know how it goes.

[Scud]

Watching autumn watch this evening. Sitting outside and listening,watching birds will improve your well being and mental health. This weekends project is to throw some sand down in the greenhouse, deckchair inside and hankie with a knot in each corner on me head.

I’ll let you know how it goes.

It’ll be better than watching a teenager skulk about making a mess

[ZRX61]

Are ya getting any exercise? That sometimes helps as it gives ya mind something else to focus on.. & has the added bonus of making ya fitter & more confident... which might lead to getting yer dick wet more often.
I'm paraphrasing what my extremely cute PTSD counselor said.