Jokes Thread
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Yorick
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KungFooBob
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Yorick
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Re: Jokes Thread
Wooooooosh
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slowsider
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Re: Jokes Thread
I heard the probably apocryphal story of a target-towing aircraft pilot coming over the range radio to check that the gunners knew he was pulling not pushing...ZRX61 wrote: ↑Fri Apr 23, 2021 5:55 pmDad was an RN gunnery Chief. Destroyer off Portland & tug with a towed target on the end of a LONG cable. First sighting shot hit the shackle on the target & parted the cable. "I think we're done here"Saga Lout wrote: ↑Fri Apr 23, 2021 6:36 am In the 70s, about 1972 or 1973, I was on a target towing boat in the North Sea. The boat towed a device that created a fountain of water as a target for aircraft to shoot at. I can't say I was scared but watching a Buccaneer heading straight for you and firing it's rockets is certainly impressive.
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Tricky
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JackyJoll
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Taipan
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Ditchfinder
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Taipan
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KungFooBob
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Taipan
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Taipan
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Re: Jokes Thread
I've been having anger issues lately so I went for therapy. My Therapist said to write letters to the people I hate and then burn them. I did that, but not sure what to do with the letters now?
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KungFooBob
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Trinity765
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Horse
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Re: Jokes Thread
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Even bland can be a type of character 
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MingtheMerciless
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Re: Jokes Thread
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"Of all the stories you told me, which ones were true and which ones weren't?"
"My dear Doctor, they're all true."
"Even the lies?"
"Especially the lies."
"My dear Doctor, they're all true."
"Even the lies?"
"Especially the lies."
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ogri
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Re: Jokes Thread
HOW MOSES GOT THE 10 COMMANDMENTS
God went to the Arabs and said, 'I have Commandments for you that will make your lives better.'
The Arabs asked, 'What are Commandments?'
And the Lord said, 'They are rules for living.'
'Can you give us an example?'
'Thou shall not kill.'
'Not kill? We're not interested.'
So He went to the Blacks and said, 'I have Commandments.'
The Blacks wanted an example, and the Lord said, 'Honor thy Father and Mother.'
'Father? We don't know who our fathers are. We're not interested.'
Then He went to the Mexicans and said, 'I have Commandments.'
The Mexicans also wanted an example, and the Lord said 'Thou shall not steal.'
'Not steal? We're not interested.'
Then He went to the French and said, 'I have Commandments.'
The French too wanted an example and the Lord said, 'Thou shall not commit adultery.'
'Sacre bleu!!! Not commit adultery? We're not interested.'
Finally, He went to the Jews and said, 'I have Commandments.'
'Commandments?' They said, 'How much are they?'
'They're free.'
'We'll take 10.'
There, that should offend just about everybody.
God went to the Arabs and said, 'I have Commandments for you that will make your lives better.'
The Arabs asked, 'What are Commandments?'
And the Lord said, 'They are rules for living.'
'Can you give us an example?'
'Thou shall not kill.'
'Not kill? We're not interested.'
So He went to the Blacks and said, 'I have Commandments.'
The Blacks wanted an example, and the Lord said, 'Honor thy Father and Mother.'
'Father? We don't know who our fathers are. We're not interested.'
Then He went to the Mexicans and said, 'I have Commandments.'
The Mexicans also wanted an example, and the Lord said 'Thou shall not steal.'
'Not steal? We're not interested.'
Then He went to the French and said, 'I have Commandments.'
The French too wanted an example and the Lord said, 'Thou shall not commit adultery.'
'Sacre bleu!!! Not commit adultery? We're not interested.'
Finally, He went to the Jews and said, 'I have Commandments.'
'Commandments?' They said, 'How much are they?'
'They're free.'
'We'll take 10.'
There, that should offend just about everybody.
Ignorance is bliss