Jokes Thread

General chat topics, anything and everything you want or need to discuss
slowsider
Posts: 3189
Joined: Mon Mar 16, 2020 3:45 pm
Location: RoI
Has thanked: 1264 times
Been thanked: 1188 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by slowsider »

We have spectacles 8-)
User avatar
Count Steer
Posts: 11827
Joined: Mon Jul 19, 2021 4:59 pm
Has thanked: 6381 times
Been thanked: 4761 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Count Steer »

slowsider wrote: Wed Nov 03, 2021 7:39 am We have spectacles 8-)
We (some of us) also have the real thing. :mrgreen:

(Although not all of the nurses look like that :lol: )
Doubt is not a pleasant condition.
But certainty is an absurd one
.
Voltaire
User avatar
Taipan
Posts: 13951
Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 1:48 pm
Location: Essex Riviera!
Has thanked: 15961 times
Been thanked: 10248 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Taipan »

User avatar
Taipan
Posts: 13951
Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 1:48 pm
Location: Essex Riviera!
Has thanked: 15961 times
Been thanked: 10248 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Taipan »

Image
User avatar
Trinity765
Posts: 2321
Joined: Fri Nov 06, 2020 2:27 pm
Location: Brighton
Has thanked: 2442 times
Been thanked: 2398 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Trinity765 »

:P
Attachments
25.jpg
25.jpg (48.64 KiB) Viewed 537 times
User avatar
Horse
Posts: 11558
Joined: Sun Mar 15, 2020 11:30 am
Location: Always sunny southern England
Has thanked: 6196 times
Been thanked: 5088 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Horse »

20211105_203854.jpg
20211105_203854.jpg (300.3 KiB) Viewed 535 times
Even bland can be a type of character :wave:
Saga Lout
Posts: 1841
Joined: Sun Mar 15, 2020 3:38 pm
Location: North East Essex
Has thanked: 566 times
Been thanked: 756 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Saga Lout »

They may have thought they were in Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch but the nearest Burger King is the other side of the Menai Strait.[/pedant] :P
User avatar
Taipan
Posts: 13951
Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 1:48 pm
Location: Essex Riviera!
Has thanked: 15961 times
Been thanked: 10248 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Taipan »

Image
User avatar
derek badger
Posts: 898
Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 1:12 pm
Location: Surrey Hills
Has thanked: 769 times
Been thanked: 1135 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by derek badger »

Yesterday my wife gave me a sealed envelope that had "Do not open until 2025" on it. Inside was a list of reasons why I can't be trusted to follow simple instructions.
Saga Lout
Posts: 1841
Joined: Sun Mar 15, 2020 3:38 pm
Location: North East Essex
Has thanked: 566 times
Been thanked: 756 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Saga Lout »

derek badger wrote: Sun Nov 07, 2021 2:28 pm Yesterday my wife gave me a sealed envelope that had "Do not open until 2025" on it. Inside was a list of reasons why I can't be trusted to follow simple instructions.
Did you open it at 25 past 8?
User avatar
Horse
Posts: 11558
Joined: Sun Mar 15, 2020 11:30 am
Location: Always sunny southern England
Has thanked: 6196 times
Been thanked: 5088 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Horse »

254687652_10159620981429636_2603878514486389000_n.jpg
254687652_10159620981429636_2603878514486389000_n.jpg (67.57 KiB) Viewed 421 times
Even bland can be a type of character :wave:
User avatar
Taipan
Posts: 13951
Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 1:48 pm
Location: Essex Riviera!
Has thanked: 15961 times
Been thanked: 10248 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Taipan »

Today I met the man who invented the window cill, honestly what a ledge...
User avatar
Taipan
Posts: 13951
Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 1:48 pm
Location: Essex Riviera!
Has thanked: 15961 times
Been thanked: 10248 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Taipan »

The giraffe I bought in the summer to save money trimming the tall hedges is costing a bloody fortune in scarves since the weather has turned...
User avatar
Count Steer
Posts: 11827
Joined: Mon Jul 19, 2021 4:59 pm
Has thanked: 6381 times
Been thanked: 4761 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Count Steer »

Did you know that if you look at the word 'gullible' upside down it looks like a fish?
Doubt is not a pleasant condition.
But certainty is an absurd one
.
Voltaire
Saga Lout
Posts: 1841
Joined: Sun Mar 15, 2020 3:38 pm
Location: North East Essex
Has thanked: 566 times
Been thanked: 756 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Saga Lout »

Count Steer wrote: Mon Nov 08, 2021 8:12 pm Did you know that if you look at the word 'gullible' upside down it looks like a fish?
I didn't know that. But everybody knows that it's not in the dictionary, don't they?
User avatar
Horse
Posts: 11558
Joined: Sun Mar 15, 2020 11:30 am
Location: Always sunny southern England
Has thanked: 6196 times
Been thanked: 5088 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Horse »

IMG-20211109-WA0000.jpg
IMG-20211109-WA0000.jpg (49.06 KiB) Viewed 342 times
Even bland can be a type of character :wave:
User avatar
Taipan
Posts: 13951
Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 1:48 pm
Location: Essex Riviera!
Has thanked: 15961 times
Been thanked: 10248 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Taipan »

Image
User avatar
KungFooBob
Posts: 14213
Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 1:04 pm
Location: The content of this post is not AI generated.
Has thanked: 539 times
Been thanked: 7534 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by KungFooBob »

Taipan wrote: Thu Nov 11, 2021 9:32 am Image
But they can swim, at Neum.
Wossname
Posts: 912
Joined: Fri Apr 10, 2020 7:14 pm
Location: West of the Tamar
Has thanked: 229 times
Been thanked: 575 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Wossname »

IMG-20211110-WA0000.jpg
IMG-20211110-WA0000.jpg (40.87 KiB) Viewed 711 times
User avatar
Taipan
Posts: 13951
Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2020 1:48 pm
Location: Essex Riviera!
Has thanked: 15961 times
Been thanked: 10248 times

Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Taipan »

KungFooBob wrote: Thu Nov 11, 2021 10:14 am
Taipan wrote: Thu Nov 11, 2021 9:32 am Image
But they can swim, at Neum.
All of them! :D