Insignificant/ Significant things that BYP or just wind you up a little

[gremlin]

Dog shit. You're supposed to pick it up, you selfish bastards.

Or, as I saw in my local woods this morning, pick it up, and tie the bag to a branch, at face level of course, in a nice bow.

FFS, if you go to that much trouble just take it to the shit bin, which is no more than 5 mins away, and do the decent thing.

[Taipan]

Dog shit. You're supposed to pick it up, you selfish bastards.

We hang ours in the bushes tittle purple bags which are quit obvious to see, but the dog shit collecting chap still doesn't pick them up! Sack him/her the lazy fooker!

[Jody]

My winter employers won't let me bring a dog with me, so I had to turn down the offer of a rescue dog

BMP is the bosses saying "what if you have to go to Geneva, the dog would be on it's own for 6 hours"

What about when you told me at interview that I'd never have to go to Geneva, what about if I buy a cage and keep him in that while driving

[MrLongbeard]

Auto renewing policies, ok so maybe not that, but that every last bloody one of them (well except my last bike insurance) try to take the piss on the price.

C'mon anyone can spend 2 minutes on the internet and get a better deal than your artificiality hiked renewal quote, but you make it sound like you're doing us a favour to match it when we offer to leave.

Just give me a straight up honest to god best price, a price where you can provide the service and make profit, and don't make me spend 15 minutes on the phone 'twisting your arm'

[Rockburner]

Auto renewing policies, ok so maybe not that, but that every last bloody one of them (well except my last bike insurance) try to take the piss on the price.

C'mon anyone can spend 2 minutes on the internet and get a better deal than your artificiality hiked renewal quote, but you make it sound like you're doing us a favour to match it when we offer to leave.

Just give me a straight up honest to god best price, a price where you can provide the service and make profit, and don't make me spend 15 minutes on the phone 'twisting your arm'

Especially when the 'extra special renewal quote' has half the clauses (pillion, commuting, euro-travel etc) removed from your original policy.

[Taipan]

People moan about the youths and how they behave during this pandemic, but I went to our local Tesco today and the majority of the (double jabbed) OAPs didn't have masks on and were quite happy to clutter up the aisles talking and completely ignore and disregard social distancing requirements.

[weeksy]

My lad seems to have misplaced my new shock pump on the side of a hill.... Grrrrrr.

£40 i need to shell out now.

[Saga Lout]

My lad seems to have misplaced my new shock pump on the side of a hill.... Grrrrrr.

£40 i need to shell out now.

Take it out of his pocket money. He'll be more careful in future.

[weeksy]

My lad seems to have misplaced my new shock pump on the side of a hill.... Grrrrrr.

£40 i need to shell out now.

Take it out of his pocket money. He'll be more careful in future.

He's never had any.

[Skub]

My lad seems to have misplaced my new shock pump on the side of a hill.... Grrrrrr.

£40 i need to shell out now.

Take it out of his pocket money. He'll be more careful in future.

He's never had any.

Maybe he's ebayed the pump for some pocket money?

[Wossname]

My lad seems to have misplaced my new shock pump on the side of a hill.... Grrrrrr.

£40 i need to shell out now.

Tarmacsurfer found it last night. It "made him happy". <<clue

[MingtheMerciless]

I have scratched my glasses, its a tiny insignificant scratch, RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE! It's so bloody annoying.

[Yorick]

I have scratched my glasses, its a tiny insignificant scratch, RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE! It's so bloody annoying.

I buy 3 or 4 pairs at a time from that internet thingy. Tenner each.

I'm a twat and break or lose a pair every 2 or 3 months.

[Taipan]

I have scratched my glasses, its a tiny insignificant scratch, RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE! It's so bloody annoying.

I'm a twat

FTFY!

[Yorick]

I have scratched my glasses, its a tiny insignificant scratch, RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE! It's so bloody annoying.

I'm a twat

FTFY!

I'll see you at play time tmrw.

[Jody]

"Work" computer systems

5 years ago we had a really basic but effective system, it paired well with the spreadsheet I wrote to make a very neat product. I reported to Head Office to not change the system as the Wifi on campsites is often so bad, any 'bigger' system would really struggle

3 years ago they changed the system, it has lots of new features that aren't needed, and as I predicted, lots of problems due to naff wifi. With my spreadsheet alongside it, it worked OK.

Last year we were told to be very careful with what we were spending as the pandemic had hit the company hard.

This year we have another brand new system, lots of features we don't need, and negates the need for my spreadsheet!

Except the spreadsheet bit doesn't work properly, so I do still need mine. Some of the useful features from the last two systems are not available with this new system.

It progress, you see, progress to spend €???? on a new system that isn't needed and doesn't work !

[David]

But someone in your company will have benefitted from the purchase...
It will eventually fall over and then they might go back to a simpler system, and you can guarentee the numpty that fixed it this time will benefit or get promoted again.

[MingtheMerciless]

Nissan, the X-Trail needs new rear drop links. I have just discovered the bolts holding the drop links are 18mm. I have one shonky 18mm socket in my tool kit as I've never needed 18mm tools before. Also due to Nissan using up old Lancia super-corrodo-steel© stock on all their nuts and bolts I'll need a special long spanner and a 6 point socket to have a hope of freeing off the buggers. Looks like the tools will cost more than the parts!

[DefTrap]

Nissan, the X-Trail needs new rear drop links. I have just discovered the bolts holding the drop links are 18mm. I have one shonky 18mm socket in my tool kit as I've never needed 18mm tools before. Also due to Nissan using up old Lancia super-corrodo-steel© stock on all their nuts and bolts I'll need a special long spanner and a 6 point socket to have a hope of freeing off the buggers. Looks like the tools will cost more than the parts!

Yeah but new tools! Mmmmmm ....

.. or you could shim a bigger socket

[Silly Car]

Nissan, the X-Trail needs new rear drop links. I have just discovered the bolts holding the drop links are 18mm. I have one shonky 18mm socket in my tool kit as I've never needed 18mm tools before. Also due to Nissan using up old Lancia super-corrodo-steel© stock on all their nuts and bolts I'll need a special long spanner and a 6 point socket to have a hope of freeing off the buggers. Looks like the tools will cost more than the parts!

I had a similar issue with the drop links on my mondeo years ago, I didn’t have the right sized spanner so *had* to go and buy a set of Halford Pro ratchet spanners, such a shame...

Strangely, the automatic headlight drop links on my BMW need doing but the man will do those when it is serviced next month.