The holy grail of self indulgent anecdotes...

[Asian Boss]

Sometimes someone will attempt to indulge themselves at your expense with a lengthy anecdote of theirs.

The best response is to retort with one of your own which somehow trumps or betters theirs. Maybe to such an extent it belittles them due to the disparity.

[gremlin]

I once burnt two rounds of toast, on the trot.

[Taipan]

I found a £20 note sitting under a bench once. I broke my £120 glasses on the bench as I tried to retrieve said note!

[KungFooBob]

Do you get extra points for name dropping celebrities?

[Skub]

Sometimes someone will attempt to indulge themselves at your expense with a lengthy anecdote of theirs.

The best response is to retort with one of your own which somehow trumps or betters theirs. Maybe to such an extent it belittles them due to the disparity.

Did the missus let you off with that?

[ChrisW]

You should never name drop. Robert de Niro told me that.

[Count Steer]

I got a £25k bonus once, I was buzzing, went for a pint with a member of VD (our old bike forum for those that don't remember), and then he told me about his £1.1m bonus

I told you not to tell anyone.

[Mr Moofo]

I got a £25k bonus once, I was buzzing, went for a pint with a member of VD (our old bike forum for those that don't remember), and then he told me about his £1.1m bonus

And how is he these days ?

[Count Steer]

I got a £25k bonus once, I was buzzing, went for a pint with a member of VD (our old bike forum for those that don't remember), and then he told me about his £1.1m bonus

And how is he these days ?

Fine thanks.

[McSatan]

I once strangled Wayne Hussey out of the Mission for trying to steal my cigarettes. I was applauded by members of the Hothouse Flowers and Trashcan Sinatras, popular beat combos at the time. Neneh Cherry was there as well (a hotel in Lancaster Gate) but didn't clap.

[Le_Fromage_Grande]

Do you get extra points for name dropping celebrities?

I had a sweary argument with Boris Johnson on Grays Inn Road in that there London one morning on way to work (it might equally have been at lunch time) about him riding a bicycle on the footpath

[Count Steer]

Do you get extra points for name dropping celebrities?

I had a sweary argument with Boris Johnson on Grays Inn Road in that there London one morning on way to work (it might equally have been at lunch time) about him riding a bicycle on the footpath

Oh you're the gobby bloke he was telling me about. Small world eh?

[Pirahna]

I got a £25k bonus once, I was buzzing, went for a pint with a member of VD (our old bike forum for those that don't remember), and then he told me about his £1.1m bonus

I once had a manager ask me to spend a decent amount of time working on a system that would be decommissioned before I'd finished, I think it was desparation on his part when he said my continued refusal could affect my bonus. I told him to find out by how much it could affect it. Fair play to him, he came back a few days later and said he had no idea people on my grade (the people doing the work) got such a small bonus.

[1913]

I was at Windsor Castle for my daughters investiture, Princess Ann personally ignored me.

[ZRX61]

Depending on your point of view, I was either run over by Princess Edward or I knocked him off his bicycle when he was a student at Cambridge.

[Count Steer]

Depending on your point of view, I was either run over by Princess Edward or I knocked him off his bicycle when he was a student at Cambridge.

Surprised he wasn't surrounded by a phalanx of bicycle riding security people. Was he just pedalling around on his own?

[Horse]

Depending on your point of view, I was either run over by Princess Edward or I knocked him off his bicycle when he was a student at Cambridge.

Surprised he wasn't surrounded by a phalanx of bicycle riding security people. Was he just pedalling around on his own?

A third-hand story by now: Eddie's security person would stand and watch as he got pissed and fell over in the gutter while at Cambridge.

[asmethurst99]

My friends wife was sick over Richard Harris 's dog

[Count Steer]

My friends wife was sick over Richard Harris 's dog

Did she look at it with a puzzled expression and say 'I don't remember eating that!'

[Mr Moofo]

I went to Fragrance Manufacturers Ball ( Yup, there is such a thing).
I ended up standing next to Boy George - whose book I had just finished reading (Think this might have glossed over the kidnap). I mention I had just just read it and it sounded an interesting life up until now, to which he went all drama queen telling me how lucky I was that I hadn't had to live it" - knob

Standing on the other side of me was Joan Collins ( who smells funny) and her then beau , who I think was a robot made from wax.
Jody Kidd was nice , mind