Insignificant/ Significant things that BYP or just wind you up a little

[v8-powered]

FWIW, I knew a BMW car salesman who mainly dealt with fleet purchases, but one day he helped a scruffy oik who wondered in and asked for brochures, etc.

A lottery winner, out to get the car he'd always wanted.

Had something similar many years ago in a Merc dealer. Group of pikeys came in, looked at an E-class estate in the show room. Pulled out a bag full of notes, presented to the salesman and wanted to take it there and then....

[Cousin Jack]

We're selling our mock Tudor place on a new(ish) estate, they're cardboard and airbrick but popular and whilst it's in the frozen north and worth tuppence they still sell for a few hundred large. Then I've shown them another few hundred in cash.

It's not like I wandered in off the street with my pockets turned out and looking like a paraffin.

They can see I'm good for most of it, but they want to see the rest and that would mean providing another two sets of bank statements, or moving it into one and then giving them that, and I just don't want to do it when at this stage I only want to view.
I also don't like telling the receptionist what's wrong with me when I phone the doctors for an appointment.

Imagine going to buy a bike and the seller forces you to hand over bank statements before he'll open the garage and show you the bike.

I would be pissed off too, but OTOH I live in the UK, have lived in the same place for years, and a little research would show I am a solid citizen. You on the other hand waltz in from foreign climes, have a UK house miles away that you are allegedly selling, and are biting off a large chunk of real estate. If I were selling a £3/4m house I would expect my estate agent to check you a bit carefully.

[DefTrap]

I think we're in agreement that Estate Agents are staffed by dizzy blondes and wideboys called Gareth in terrible suits, with a guy in his 50s/60s at the top raking in all the cash. But he can't expect the moronic ground troops to do actually do their jobs, use some common sense and actually apply some intelligence - so they come up with a formula that everyone follows and exposes them to least cockups. 95% of their customers will be happy and that's probably good enough.

[Newey]

People who have had their teeth whitened and it's only the front few, leaving the others looking off white in contrast, it like only cleaning the top half of your car, notice it a lot more when i see them on the telly.

[Tricky]

It will need Potter to confirm, but I got the impression that this is a new purchase, 'cash buyer', rather than part- or wholly-funded by sale of the other place.

We're selling our mock Tudor place on a new(ish) estate, they're cardboard and airbrick but popular and whilst it's in the frozen north and worth tuppence they still sell for a few hundred large. Then I've shown them another few hundred in cash.

It's not like I wandered in off the street with my pockets turned out and looking like a paraffin.

They can see I'm good for most of it, but they want to see the rest and that would mean providing another two sets of bank statements, or moving it into one and then giving them that, and I just don't want to do it when at this stage I only want to view.
I also don't like telling the receptionist what's wrong with me when I phone the doctors for an appointment.

Imagine going to buy a bike and the seller forces you to hand over bank statements before he'll open the garage and show you the bike.

Going by the above, it sounds to me that either whoever you are dealing with is a fucking moron if they are insisting on that and don't even want a conversation with you about it, or maybe something like your timescales or lack of rule you out, albeit if it were that any one with half a brain cell would tell you so - there is qualification to sift out the time-wasters and there is sales prevention; evidencing the source(s) of the funds for the full offer prices is understandable (and would be expected by me) IMO before accepting any offer, but not at this stage

I think we're in agreement that Estate Agents are staffed by dizzy blondes and wideboys called Gareth in terrible suits, with a guy in his 50s/60s at the top raking in all the cash. But he can't expect the moronic ground troops to do actually do their jobs, use some common sense and actually apply some intelligence - so they come up with a formula that everyone follows and exposes them to least cockups. 95% of their customers will be happy and that's probably good enough.

Well, not all of us are in agreement of that- I bought 2 of my houses and sold 3 of them through the same agent, had 3 different people managing the 5 transactions but it was consistent and a top professional service every time.
Yep, undoubtedly there are a lot of bluffers and wideboys in that industry, as there are in pretty much every heavily sales-led environment IME, but there are some decent ones too
( well one or two anyway )

[Rockburner]

It's not THAT hard to redact a pdf these days.....

[Horse]

People who have had their teeth whitened

Doesn't BMP, more amuses: people who dye their black and end up looking as if they've bleached their face.

[Mussels]

It's not THAT hard to redact a pdf these days.....

Or completely fabricate one, it's not proof of anything.

[Mussels]

People who have had their teeth whitened and it's only the front few, leaving the others looking off white in contrast, it like only cleaning the top half of your car, notice it a lot more when i see them on the telly.

I have never noticed this before but I probably will now and it will probably irritate me, thanks for sharing.

[Newey]

People who have had their teeth whitened and it's only the front few, leaving the others looking off white in contrast, it like only cleaning the top half of your car, notice it a lot more when i see them on the telly.

I have never noticed this before but I probably will now and it will probably irritate me, thanks for sharing.

Yep sorry bout that.

[Pirahna]

Wifey's total inability to make a decision. We've decided to sell the camper (it's outside Taipans price range), the bloke who built it will sell it and the price he'll get will be way above anything we get. He's messaged me this morning and needs the van because people want to see it but wifey's not sure if she want to sell it this month. FFS, just take the money and move into a hotel for a couple of months. The price difference between him selling it and us or waiting for three months will cover hotel costs many times over.

In the meantime we need to source alternative transport in the shape of a van. I've lined up a few to look at but she doesn't want to drive the camper around and doesn't want to hire a small car. I think I'll pack a bag and go to the old mans in Ireland, she can get in touch when she's sorted everything.

[Noggin]

Having limited mobility and having the cleaners at rehab move things in my room so I have to try and shift them back, either from a wheelchair or whilst on crutches!!

FFS, everyone here has some sort of restricted movement and I'd guess, like me, that everyone changes things so they are within reach or easy.

When I get back from pool treatment and the shower chair is the other side of the mahooosive bathroom, it wastes the short time I have to shower and get ready for physio, and also pisses me off as it's hard to reach the brakes and difficult to move whilst on crutches, more difficult if I stay in the wheel chair!!!

The bloody bin moves all over the sodding room!! I have to go search for it each time I come back from physio in the morning!!

Fukkers!!!

[Cousin Jack]

The bloody bin moves all over the sodding room!! I have to go search for it each time I come back from physio in the morning!!

Superglue is your friend.

[Noggin]

The bloody bin moves all over the sodding room!! I have to go search for it each time I come back from physio in the morning!!

Superglue is your friend.

Didn't bring any

[Count Steer]

Zip tie bin to ---->

Sorted.

[Noggin]

Zip tie bin to ---->

Sorted.

That's assuming I can find a zip tie here!! LOL


(I'm going to look over the next few days )

[Felix]

Amazon using Hermes/Evri for deliveries.

[gremlin]

Those little cunty caterpillars that kill your boxus hedges.

My balls out front were the talk of the neighbourhood, but now they're just a dry, shadow of their former glory.

[Jody]

Utubers offering patreons the opportunity to see videos "before anyone else"

It's not before 'anyone' else as obviously all the Patreons will gain access to the new video at the same time !

[Yorick]

Utubers offering patreons the opportunity to see videos "before anyone else"

It's not before 'anyone' else as obviously all the Patreons will gain access to the new video at the same time !

In English?