Broken down

[Slenver]

Sat at the side of the road next to a KTM with seized brakes waiting for the RAC.

Tell me a joke.

[David]

I hope your recovery goes smoother than mine did....

[Mr. Dazzle]

Seized brakes probably ain't worth having a breakdown over chap.

[Skub]

What do you can an Indian skip diver?

Rumma Jing.

Feel better now?

[Slenver]

What do you can an Indian skip diver?

Rumma Jing.

Feel better now?

I mean... maybe like 2% better?

[Skub]

I mean... maybe like 2% better?

Can ye no crack a caliper nipple and back off the pads as a 'get home' effort?

[Mr. Dazzle]

Could have been worse, they could have failed the other way around

[Slenver]

I mean... maybe like 2% better?

Can ye no crack a caliper nipple and back off the pads as a 'get home' effort?

Now they've cooled they've unlocked but RAC due any moment. Dealer is, my massive coincidence, only 7 miles away so I'll ride it there if I have to.

[Slenver]

Could have been worse, they could have failed the other way around

It's true. More a false positive than a false negative.

I'm more grateful that I wasn't on the fast bit of dual carriageway I'd have been on in 10 minutes doing 120!

[Docca]

[Docca]

Also - where are you? If local-ish, I can pop down with a cuppa

[Slenver]

Also - where are you? If local-ish, I can pop down with a cuppa

That's very kind of you. I'm near Braintree though.

Got bored of waiting for RAC so rode it to dealer avoiding the rear brake. Hopefully ready in a moment but took the opportunity to take a 990 Duke out for an hour while I was waiting

[Slenver]

I always carry a wrench and some sockets (I ride old bikes), I'd have had the caliber off, tie-wrapped to the fork leg and rode home with just one brake.

Can't think of a suitable joke, sorry.
Should have bought a Porsche

I have the mechanical skills of a dolphin, and not one of the clever ones even.

I just switched off the ABS, hill hold etc and didn't use the rear brake at all.

[MrLongbeard]

but RAC due any moment.

I thought you wanted us to tell the jokes

[Slenver]

but RAC due any moment.

I thought you wanted us to tell the jokes

Well the joke was on me as they never turned up

[Yorick]

What do you can an Indian skip diver?

Rumma Jing.

Feel better now?

Did you hear about the Indian gymnast?

Balan Singh.

Or his brother who was into ballet?

Dan Singh.

[ZRX61]

I always carry a wrench and some sockets (I ride old bikes), I'd have had the caliber off, tie-wrapped to the fork leg and rode home with just one brake.

Can't think of a suitable joke, sorry.
Should have bought a Porsche

I have the mechanical skills of a dolphin, and not one of the clever ones even.

I just switched off the ABS, hill hold etc and didn't use the rear brake at all.

Likely just some snarge in the return port of the m/c. A quick poke with a bit of stiff wire or a pin/needle usually cures it.

[Dodgy69]

Some bikes need plenty of slack on the rear. I once adjusted the GSs rear because I thought there was way too much travel. Once I'd done a few mile the bike would hardly move.

[Slenver]

Seized rose joint on the rear brake lever, so presumably didn't return properly when I was leaving the petrol station and then quickly overheated and expanded.

New joint £18, half an hour's labour, all good.

Wasted day but whaddyagonnado?

[Taipan]