Assistance needed - corporate jargon and job titles

[McSatan]

I had a very similar thing at UCL. I (and a few others) ended up with 'Senior IT Officer.' Wasn't bothered, pay and duties didn't change. In fact, academics and professors and the like, who, as a rule, are thick as fuck outside their chosen subject would just see the word 'Senior' on the ID card on the lanyard and give me the due deference and respect I deserved.

[Whysub]

When i was forced to phone our HR, I always started with "Hello, is that Personnel?".

[asmethurst99]

Our personnel director is called director of people …
Some of the follow up stuff they have organised post re deployment etc has been useful to be honest .
Don’t get me started on Occupational Health though …

[Rockburner]

Long story short. I need some help/ideas from those of you in large corporate environments.

Big changes ahead at work, probably good opportunities. I've been here 12 years and had as many line managers in that time, the current one is a nice guy and values and looks after his team. He pinged me on WhatsApp last night and we need to update my job description and title by the end of today.

The role itself is fine, I do a lot of stuff for a lot of people and enjoy most of it. Things changed at the start of Covid and I no longer have any reports under me, but still have the word manager in my job title - Service Delivery Manager. In HR's eyes this isn't right, needs to be removed and could affect future paygrading. Neither one of us want this clearly. So I need a new job title that would command a slightly higher than market rate salary, so that I can be in a position for an increase next review, but doesn't include 'manager' in the title.

This is what I do:

• Across the EMEA region I manage technical aspects for facilities projects (office moves, changes, closures, openings and other projects).

• Lead and coordinate the technical delivery of global marketing events (tradeshows, pre-sales demos etc).

• Manage smaller IT delivery projects for the EMEA infrastructure team.

• Deal with suppliers, contracts etc.

• Techincal stakeholder for other internal projects

So...

Dogsbody?
Technical bullshit analyst?
Project implementation specialist?

In all seriousness, it needs to be a real-world title that 'fits' and an HR team would recognise. Global corporation of 10,000 employees.

What did you end up as?

[Couchy]

Aren’t HR only there to protect the company from employees anyway ? Tbh never worked for a company with an HR department it was personnel when I last had a job

[Count Steer]

How about Lead Infrastructure Consultant - EMEA?

Every company needs LICE.

[derek badger]

What did you end up as?

Not heard back yet. I only catch up with my boss about once a week as he's based in France and I WFH.

[Mr Moofo]

Aren’t HR only there to protect the company from employees anyway ? Tbh never worked for a company with an HR department it was personnel when I last had a job

They are not there to support try worker. They are there to support the management - so they don’t do anything that they can be taken to court for, and the shareholders.

And generally they are lying snakes - or barking mad

[G.P]

I reckon "Head of department for getting shit done"

[Horse]

"Supreme overlord leader of the department for getting shit done"

Expanded for greater modesty

But rubbish abbreviation. I've known an A.R.S.E.* and a S.H.O.D.Dy - the first is actually true, the second was what everyone knew him as.

* Accident Remedial Schemes Engineer

[Asian Boss]

I had a very similar thing at UCL. I (and a few others) ended up with 'Senior IT Officer.' Wasn't bothered, pay and duties didn't change. In fact, academics and professors and the like, who, as a rule, are thick as fuck outside their chosen subject would just see the word 'Senior' on the ID card on the lanyard and give me the due deference and respect I deserved.

Due deference... for a NDWiIT.