Jokes Thread

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Taipan
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Yorick wrote: Tue Jan 14, 2025 12:04 am
Taipan wrote: Mon Jan 13, 2025 9:36 pm I bought my wife a fur coat made from a thousand Russian hamsters. I took here to Blackpool for the weekend to show it off but i couldn't get her off the big wheel...
Yorick just called wanting its joke back.
EFA! :thumbup:
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Re: Jokes Thread

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I was sexually active at 10.

It is now 10:15 and my arm hurts.
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Re: Jokes Thread

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What do you call a Yorkshire man that sells cars?

Brad Ford
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Even bland can be a type of character :wave:
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Re: Jokes Thread

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"Be kind to past versions of yourself that didn't know what you know now."
Walt Whitman
https://soundcloud.com/skub1955
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Re: Jokes Thread

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Re: Jokes Thread

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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by KungFooBob »

A group of wotsit fans.
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Re: Jokes Thread

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I watched limitless win last week and the question was how long is the lead on a Henry hoover how is a man supposed to know that honestly these programs are so sexist! :angry-cussingblack:
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Apparently, Enough weight
so I don't have to hold my
belly up when I shave my
minge isn't a standard
measurement of weight loss
when the personal trainer
asks how much weight you
want to lose
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Apparently my weight would only be healthy to someone who is 8ft 6. So clearly I have height problem and not a weight one...
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Re: Jokes Thread

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If drinking alcohol can damage your short term memory, just imagine what drinking alcohol can do!
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by KungFooBob »

That's my next holiday location selected.
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Re: Jokes Thread

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:D


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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by JackyJoll »

Most of you old gits are probably Susan Boyle fans, but are you sufficiently dedicated for this??
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Re: Jokes Thread

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