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Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Wed May 20, 2026 8:01 pm
by Taipan
Saga Lout wrote: Wed May 20, 2026 4:36 pm
This is a question that's been bugging me on and off for about 66 years.
Let me set the scene: I am about 10 or 11 years old and at school I'm in the class that is expected to do well in the 11 plus exam. The head teacher "demotes" me to the thickie class, the class that isn't expected to do well in the 11 plus exam. (It's a trumped up charge but I think it's really because she's had a falling out with my step mother.)
Anyway, one of the exercises the thickies do is about opposites and it goes something like this:
Teacher: "Up"
Class (and me): "Down"
Teacher: "Left"
Class (and me): "Right"
Teacher: "Forward"
Class (and me): "Backward"
Teacher: "Fast"
Class (and me): "Slow"
Teacher: "Dog"
Me: Thinks "WTF"
The questions: What would your answer be? And Is there anybody in the world apart from thick 10 year old kids and teachers who thinks the opposite of dog is
Cat?
I would have said cat, but I don't know why, really. I guess because people (mostly) have a cat or a dog as a pet?
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Wed May 20, 2026 10:37 pm
by Saga Lout
Taipan wrote: Wed May 20, 2026 8:01 pmI would have said cat...
Join the thickies who are going to the Secondary Modern.
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Wed May 20, 2026 11:12 pm
by Wossname
Count Steer wrote: Wed May 20, 2026 6:18 pm
Cousin Jack wrote: Wed May 20, 2026 6:14 pm
Count Steer wrote: Wed May 20, 2026 4:52 pm
I'd have said 'cheese'.
If the teacher had said 'cheese isn't the opposite of dog' I'd have responded 'ok smartarse, what's the opposite of cheese?'
You wouldn't. At 10 years old you would have said "cat" or (like Saga) said nothing and wondered WTF.
I was a precocious child.
I was a precious child too.
P.S: predictive text tried to change that to “previous”. It was getting mixed up with my 2 older brothers. They were previous children.
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Thu May 21, 2026 1:30 am
by ZRX61
Count Steer wrote: Wed May 20, 2026 4:52 pm
I'd have said 'cheese'.
If the teacher had said 'cheese isn't the opposite of dog' I'd have responded 'ok smartarse, what's the opposite of cheese?'
Chalk.
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Thu May 21, 2026 6:59 am
by Count Steer
ZRX61 wrote: Thu May 21, 2026 1:30 am
Count Steer wrote: Wed May 20, 2026 4:52 pm
I'd have said 'cheese'.
If the teacher had said 'cheese isn't the opposite of dog' I'd have responded 'ok smartarse, what's the opposite of cheese?'
Chalk.
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Thu May 21, 2026 7:59 am
by Horse
Saga Lout wrote: Wed May 20, 2026 10:37 pm
Taipan wrote: Wed May 20, 2026 8:01 pmI would have said cat...
Join the thickies who are going to the Secondary Modern.
Was that Schrodinger kid in your class? Or was his dad the teacher?
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Thu May 21, 2026 11:22 am
by Jody
Trinity765 wrote: Wed May 20, 2026 4:44 pm
Saga Lout wrote: Wed May 20, 2026 4:36 pm
This is a question that's been bugging me on and off for about 66 years.
Let me set the scene: I am about 10 or 11 years old and at school I'm in the class that is expected to do well in the 11 plus exam. The head teacher "demotes" me to the thickie class, the class that isn't expected to do well in the 11 plus exam. (It's a trumped up charge but I think it's really because she's had a falling out with my step mother.)
Anyway, one of the exercises the thickies do is about opposites and it goes something like this:
Teacher: "Up"
Class (and me): "Down"
Teacher: "Left"
Class (and me): "Right"
Teacher: "Forward"
Class (and me): "Backward"
Teacher: "Fast"
Class (and me): "Slow"
Teacher: "Dog"
Me: Thinks "WTF"
The questions: What would your answer be? And Is there anybody in the world apart from thick 10 year old kids and teachers who thinks the opposite of dog is
Cat?
"Teachers, leave them kids alone".
Your teacher was an idiot. They exist.
I had a supply teacher in junior school who humiliated me in front of the class for using the word "oblong". They said that the word didn't exist and was the baby word for rectangle, like the word "bunny" or "horsey". Regardless if that's true or not, and I don't think it is, I remember it - 'cos it hurt.
I had a supply teacher in primary school who asked us how many grandparents we had. I said six, she mocked me in front of the whole class for not knowing and was only too pleased to point out that her 4 year old son (who was there in the class for some reason), even he knew it was 4.
My mother had recently remarried, I had 4 original grandparents and 2 new ones, so 6.
Much like ^^^^ you mate, i remember it because it hurt.
But of course, when I was little I thought teachers knew everything and were very clever. Only as an adult did I realise that most teachers are not clever enough to do what they teach professionally.
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Thu May 21, 2026 2:04 pm
by ZRX61
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Thu May 21, 2026 2:06 pm
by gremlin
I'm trying to find a penis/phone cable related pun to come back with as a pithy reply.
Nope.
Nothing.
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Thu May 21, 2026 3:13 pm
by Horse
Jody wrote: Thu May 21, 2026 11:22 am
Only as an adult did I realise that most teachers are not clever enough to do what they teach professionally.
You're right. It's an easy, well-paid job, short hours & long holidays.
Surprising, then, so few people want to do it
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Thu May 21, 2026 7:27 pm
by Jody
gremlin wrote: Thu May 21, 2026 2:06 pm
I'm trying to find a penis/phone cable related pun to come back with as a pithy reply.
Nope.
Nothing.
something about a dictaphone ?
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Thu May 21, 2026 9:03 pm
by Count Steer
Jody wrote: Thu May 21, 2026 7:27 pm
gremlin wrote: Thu May 21, 2026 2:06 pm
I'm trying to find a penis/phone cable related pun to come back with as a pithy reply.
Nope.
Nothing.
something about a dictaphone ?
Trying to connect to make a trunk call?
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Thu May 21, 2026 10:33 pm
by Horse
Count Steer wrote: Thu May 21, 2026 9:03 pm
Jody wrote: Thu May 21, 2026 7:27 pm
gremlin wrote: Thu May 21, 2026 2:06 pm
I'm trying to find a penis/phone cable related pun to come back with as a pithy reply.
Nope.
Nothing.
something about a dictaphone ?
Trying to connect to make a trunk call?
Wired for sound?
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Thu May 28, 2026 7:43 pm
by Taipan
Why do we read WTF if full but LOL in abbreviation?
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Thu May 28, 2026 7:56 pm
by Saga Lout
Taipan wrote: Thu May 28, 2026 7:43 pm
Why do we read WTF if full but LOL in abbreviation?
Who is this "we" you're talking about?
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Thu May 28, 2026 7:57 pm
by Rockburner
Taipan wrote: Thu May 28, 2026 7:43 pm
Why do we read WTF if full but LOL in abbreviation?
less syllables.
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Thu May 28, 2026 9:54 pm
by Druid
Rockburner wrote: Thu May 28, 2026 7:57 pm
Taipan wrote: Thu May 28, 2026 7:43 pm
Why do we read WTF if full but LOL in abbreviation?
less syllables.
Fewer syllables
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Wed Jun 03, 2026 3:22 pm
by ZRX61
Is there a law on the books in the UK that deals with employees who cause someones death through inaction or negligence?
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Wed Jun 03, 2026 4:29 pm
by David
Yes.
Re: Questions that need to be answered
Posted: Wed Jun 03, 2026 4:40 pm
by Jody
Rockburner wrote: Thu May 28, 2026 7:57 pm
Taipan wrote: Thu May 28, 2026 7:43 pm
Why do we read WTF if full but LOL in abbreviation?
less syllables.
Like saying Double you, double you, double you
instead of
World wide web ?
