Insignificant/ Significant things that BYP or just wind you up a little

[G.P]

This is a weird one. There's a guy who lives down the road who's got a 12 plate T5 VW van.
He spent quite a bit of time fitting it out and put some nice wheels and striping on it.
That was a couple of years ago and he hasn't washed it since. our road is quite leafy so its covered in a layer of green growth even though he uses it regularly. Every time I walk past while walking the dogs (at least a couple of times a day) I am tempted to scribble "please clean Me" in the filth.

[Rockburner]

This is a weird one. There's a guy who lives down the road who's got a 12 plate T5 VW van.
He spent quite a bit of time fitting it out and put some nice wheels and striping on it.
That was a couple of years ago and he hasn't washed it since. our road is quite leafy so its covered in a layer of green growth even though he uses it regularly. Every time I walk past while walking the dogs (at least a couple of times a day) I am tempted to scribble "please clean Me" in the filth.

"I wish my wife was this dirty"

[Silly Car]

This is a weird one. There's a guy who lives down the road who's got a 12 plate T5 VW van.
He spent quite a bit of time fitting it out and put some nice wheels and striping on it.
That was a couple of years ago and he hasn't washed it since. our road is quite leafy so its covered in a layer of green growth even though he uses it regularly. Every time I walk past while walking the dogs (at least a couple of times a day) I am tempted to scribble "please clean Me" in the filth.

"I wish my wife was this dirty"

Followed by

“She is”

[G.P]

Followed by

“She is”

Not you as well?

[Mussels]

Local councils that just don't understand customer service.
It's not that the bin men refused to empty my garden waste but that I can't dispute their mistake, because they said no the computer says no. I have no choice who provides my services so they don't care.

Time to eat a bit of humble pie, I just had a woman from the council knock on my door to discuss it.
And I was in the wrong.

[Horse]

My memory sucks!

Went to get a coffee yesterday after class. Asked a couple of girls that were sat at one end of a table if I could sit at the other. Then, when they said 'Hi Smixxy" realised that they were not french and I should know them!!

So, I can't search for them on Fb, cos I don't know who they are!!

Can't sort out meeting, unless she messages


AND - feel really daft cos we had a fab conversation between the three of us and yet I have zero idea who they are!!!

Post up a message along the lines of "really lovely surprise today. Was in a world of my own, started talking in French to two English friends! Message me about meeting up, when is good for you, etc,"

[Saga Lout]

My memory sucks!

Went to get a coffee yesterday after class. Asked a couple of girls that were sat at one end of a table if I could sit at the other. Then, when they said 'Hi Smixxy" realised that they were not french and I should know them!!

We chatted for quite a long time, with one of them offering to meet to chat in French when she is back from a trip next week

Eventually they left and the one that is going to meet to chat in French said she'd message me on FB to catch up


The whole time I was talking I was thinking, I'll remember who they are in a minute!!!! I didn't

So, I can't search for them on Fb, cos I don't know who they are!!

Can't sort out meeting, unless she messages


AND - feel really daft cos we had a fab conversation between the three of us and yet I have zero idea who they are!!!

One of the advantages of getting old. You just say "My memory's gone, I can't remember your name."

And they tell you, something like: "You daft bugger, I'm your sister."

[Noggin]

My memory sucks!

Went to get a coffee yesterday after class. Asked a couple of girls that were sat at one end of a table if I could sit at the other. Then, when they said 'Hi Smixxy" realised that they were not french and I should know them!!

We chatted for quite a long time, with one of them offering to meet to chat in French when she is back from a trip next week

Eventually they left and the one that is going to meet to chat in French said she'd message me on FB to catch up


The whole time I was talking I was thinking, I'll remember who they are in a minute!!!! I didn't

So, I can't search for them on Fb, cos I don't know who they are!!

Can't sort out meeting, unless she messages


AND - feel really daft cos we had a fab conversation between the three of us and yet I have zero idea who they are!!!

One of the advantages of getting old. You just say "My memory's gone, I can't remember your name."

And they tell you, something like: "You daft bugger, I'm your sister."

I usually just say "I only wear my glasses for driving, so don't always recognise people" - although, TBF, I could see them just fine (eyes aren't 'that' bad!) but just had no idea who they were

[Ditchfinder]

A rabbit has discovered my lettuces and decided to dig them all up before deciding he only wanted 1 after all

[gremlin]

That smug fucking twat of a koala from the Cushelle bog roll adverts.

[Mussels]

That smug fucking twat of a koala from the Cushelle bog roll adverts.

I think you might need a holiday.

[MingtheMerciless]

A puncture

The new Ti wheel nut flange is a a smidge to large so fouls the chain adjuster bolt head

The laser alignment tool is a bit trickier to use than I’d hoped and then just when I got the hang of it the battery’s went flat.

[Jody]

Not enough water pressure on the campsite to run the pressure washer I just bought.

3 hours it took me to clean half of one decking, I have 20 to do !

[Yorick]

Not enough water pressure on the campsite to run the pressure washer I just bought.

3 hours it took me to clean half of one decking, I have 20 to do !

You need to plug it in.

[the_priest]

Automated phone menus that don't work on mobiles. You select the option "2" and it carries on with the blurb in an endless cycle. I want to cancel my home insurance renewal with HomeProtect as they are a lot more expensive this year and have gone "autorenewal" on me which I always cancel, so they are also not taking into account my preferences. So I found an email address after some google power searching and emailed them to take the renewal and cancel it. Will have the wife try phoning on her phone later today as the T&C's say you have to phone to cancel renewal. Deaf people don't have a chance with these chancers.

[Horse]

T&C's say you have to phone to cancel renewal.

And if you cancel the DD?

[the_priest]

T&C's say you have to phone to cancel renewal.

And if you cancel the DD?

Credit card payment. However I am victorious! They acknowledged the email (I put in a statement that I am deaf and they had not given any means of communication for deaf people) and so autorenewal is deaded.

[Horse]

T&C's say you have to phone to cancel renewal.

And if you cancel the DD?

Credit card payment. However I am victorious! They acknowledged the email (I put in a statement that I am deaf and they had not given any means of communication for deaf people) and so autorenewal is deaded.

Disability Discrimination Act, or whatever it is nowadays.

[Mussels]

Why do cooker manufacturers always put the near useless little oven / grill thing at the top and make me bend over further to use the fan oven?

My air fryer got drenched in the rain last night (who knew condensing gas boilers were designed to let the rain in*) and the cooker is a bit old so I thought combining the two with a modern cooker would do the trick. Air fryers have been around for years so there must be one that combines the best of both worlds, maybe turning that useless top oven into something faster. Nope, they haven't changed for 50 years.

* Apparently rain coming in should go down the condenser drain which is great until you get a torrential downpour.

[Taipan]

Forgetting my works keys and the ID badge which is on them as well. It is such a ball ache not having them. I have to get security to let me into my studio, but they have to ring a manager to confirm who I am, but of course no managers actually get in on time, so I'm kept hanging around waiting for one to show up! Fortunately, I see a maintenance guy who vouches for me. Even though I'm now in, I cant get into any different parts of the building, so can't collect or return any work and I can't access the kitchen to get a cup of tea either! I'm only here half day as well as I have Dentist this afternoon.