Insignificant/ Significant things that BYP or just wind you up a little

[JamJar]

I'd love to think a lot of these comments are in jest, but sadly I don't think so

Sadly doesn't surprise me

[Screwdriver]

Sadly doesn't surprise me

Meh, he was probably asking for it...

[Taipan]

I'd love to think a lot of these comments are in jest, but sadly I don't think so

Thats how people end up crippled and all for some wankers amusement. Have they caught him yet?

[weeksy]

I'd love to think a lot of these comments are in jest, but sadly I don't think so

Thats how people end up crippled and all for some wankers amusement. Have they caught him yet?

Dunno man, it just popped up on Insta it's not someone i follow etc.

[gremlin]

A few years back I got 'egged' on the way home from the pub. For those not familiar with this branch of hilarious humour, it involves an egg being throw at an unsuspecting pedestrian from a vehicle.

Oh the hilarity, as the blood from the gash on the back of my head mixed with the runny egg... Silly cunts.

[DefTrap]

Tripped over when jogging this morning, one of those ones where you don't realise you've done anything until you find yourself spread out on the street looking at the sky.
So now of course I have an ankle and foot swollen up like a festive halloween pumpkin and have to do the comedy old man shuffle around the house for (at least!) a week. Cocks!

[gremlin]

Tripped over when jogging this morning, one of those ones where you don't realise you've done anything until you find yourself spread out on the street looking at the sky.
So now of course I have an ankle and foot swollen up like a festive halloween pumpkin and have to do the comedy old man shuffle around the house for (at least!) a week. Cocks!

RICE.

Rest, Ice, Compress, Elevate.

GWS.

It's one of the reasons I run in the woods. Mud is softer to land on, plus you don't get quite the same size audience.

[DefTrap]

RICE.

Rest, Ice, Compress, Elevate.

GWS.

It's one of the reasons I run in the woods. Mud is softer to land on, plus you don't get quite the same size audience.

Ta.

Amusingly I'd just passed the missus (also jogging), and was poorly attempting to dismount a kerb having just skirted an oncoming car, so I literally fell in a heap in fron of her.

I'm a very poor and impatient patient - I'll definitely be trying to run on it later this week.

[mangocrazy]

The house bothering I'm doing involves those exterior grade interlocking chipboard panels - not a full 8' x 4' sheet but around half that size. I moved one from the garage into the house, then the other and thought nothing of it. ABout 10 seconds later the muscles in my shoulder started screaming in pain and then so did I. I was in mortal fear of sneezing or coughing as that induced vicious stabbing pains. Even sleeping on my right side was agony.

After about a week it's pretty much fixed itself, but I'm now very very careful when I'm moving stuff around.

[Yorick]

Tripped over when jogging this morning, one of those ones where you don't realise you've done anything until you find yourself spread out on the street looking at the sky.
So now of course I have an ankle and foot swollen up like a festive halloween pumpkin and have to do the comedy old man shuffle around the house for (at least!) a week. Cocks!

RICE.

Rest, Ice, Compress, Elevate.

GWS.

It's one of the reasons I run in the woods. Mud is softer to land on, plus you don't get quite the same size audience.

Ya mean kids laughing at fat blokes in lycra ?

[Yorick]

RICE.

Rest, Ice, Compress, Elevate.

GWS.

It's one of the reasons I run in the woods. Mud is softer to land on, plus you don't get quite the same size audience.

Ta.

Amusingly I'd just passed the missus (also jogging), and was poorly attempting to dismount a kerb having just skirted an oncoming car, so I literally fell in a heap in fron of her.

I'm a very poor and impatient patient - I'll definitely be trying to run on it later this week.

The million dollar question..

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Drum roll

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Did she laugh?

[DefTrap]

Did she laugh?

Asked me if I was ok and called me a fool in the same breath. And she kept on running.

[Taipan]

I bought some strawberries yesterday and was looking forward to scoffing them later on today as I love a nice punnet of strawberries for a bit of a treat. However my wife just saw them and said oh strawberries! We'll have a nice strawberry and rocket salad later. Putting strawberries in a salad BMP!

[Noggin]

Some people are so daft!! Everyone in my group at the school has succumbed to a cold. It's not very nice, but I'm pretty sure it's just a heavy, face watering cold. No one has needed to take time off.

Everyone has kept their distance (well, some of us haven't this week!! ** ) and some of us with the worst watering faces have been using a hand gel (like in covid times) to try and stop the spread of said cold (but when you're on buses or in classrooms everyday, nothing is really going to prevent it!!)

Monday one of the group was ill enough not to come into school. TBF, she had been avoiding everyone as much as possible but still ended up that ill. She came back yesterday still keeping everyone at arms length at a minimum.

Anyway - when we all arrived this morning at 5.45, she calmly told the other 7 in the group that she was positive for Covid She'd done a test at home and it was positive.

Ok, I get that some people still test. And maybe we all should have done. But we haven't (including the main instructor!), no one has masked up or stayed home. Over here most people accept that they might get/have it but I haven't met anyone in the last couple of years that's actually tested to be sure


Anyway - she shouted loud enough to us and a few others that the instructor on site at 6am told her she had to go home!! Then she argued that we were all ill so probably all positive. Eventually, with the director of the school, it was agreed she could stay if she wore a mask, which someone had to find her


I just think FFS!! Why do a test knowing that the school may well try and send you home?? She must have known they would suggest that?? Surely!! I still don't think I've got/had it - my lurgy feels exactly like the usual cold I get in February and sometimes December - it's just a bit early but then I'm never with a load of random people for three months before winter!!


Oh and I overheard a conversation in which she and another were saying they were forced to have the original vaccines cos it was required here - maybe if she'd had them all she' wouldn't currently be positive!! Although as I said elsewhere, I have no scientific basis for that thought

People are just daft!!




** There are three people in the group that I hug in the mornings instead of bisous/fistbump/etc. The first day they were ill they stepped back and said no. But the second, Lucie looked so sad that I just said "it's the same bug, might as well hug cos I'm just a few days ahead so it can't make any difference!!" (again, no scientific basis!!) So, now the three of us still hug but most of us do the fistbump thingy cos it's less contact!!

[Noggin]

One more hour to go. I’m in a classroom full of adult children. FFS!!

The teacher is the instructor I get on really well with but he hasn’t understood that I can’t understand what everyone is saying when they all talk at the same time (he’s a challenge when only he’s speaking cos he speaks so fast!)

Our normal classroom instructor is more fierce and when people start taking amongst themselves she’ll stop and wait till they quit that and then continue. Juan isn’t doing that. So I’ve been sat sharing a desk with a girl who talks to the two people in front and the two behind. And one of the guys in front is constantly tapping a pen or a tipped mouse on the table. The other in front continually messes with the stuff on our desk or chats with Lucie. The guy next to me is usually me know it all but today he’s Mr centre of attention and constantly interrupts or changes stuff.

FFS - Everyone is old enough to at least have a bit of respect for the instructor even if they don’t give a shit about the stupid english bird

I really really need to punch someone or something!! Very very Hard !! Sadly I know from experience that that hurts so am trying to restrain myself. But it’s a struggle

Two weeks to go - thank fuck!!!

[ZRX61]

Was at a car show with the F350 this evening. Wandered over to Del Taco to get some food. Did a quick mental calculation of the total, was then asked for somewhat less....

Walking back to the truck I looked at the receipt & noticed I'd been given the senior discount...

The fuckers.

[Bigjawa]

Our consistently useless public transport company sold myself, and a few hundred other poor sods tickets for a train that stopped at Antrim due to signalling problems. Not one notice board in the big 340 million quid station to say that there was a problem. Cue everyone getting turfed off, myself with a bloody big bicycle which can't go on the substitute bus. Cue a 16 mile ride home in the pissing rain.

[Felix]

Our consistently useless public transport company sold myself, and a few hundred other poor sods tickets for a train that stopped at Antrim due to signalling problems. Not one notice board in the big 340 million quid station to say that there was a problem. Cue everyone getting turfed off, myself with a bloody big bicycle which can't go on the substitute bus. Cue a 16 mile ride home in the pissing rain.

Scotrail has been doing this a lot of late. Early morning commuter train cancelled at last minute or evening commuter return train Cancelled also. The fuck you attitude of there staff id doing my tits right in. Last weekend the step daughter had a friend up from Manchester. Got to Carlisle to be tom we are going no further so fuck you as we have you money. It was up to him to father the next train to Glasgow. Another to Edinburgh and then another out to my town. Fuck the environment, ill take my car/van thank you.

[ZRX61]

My last experience with British Rail was 35 years ago.

Had to get from Cambridge to Harwich.

Train from Cambridge to Newmarket
Train from Newmarket to Bury St Edmunds
Train from BSE to Ipswich
Train from Ipswich to Harwich

Total time: Six fucking hours to cover about 50 fucking miles.

1 hour in Harwich to take care of some immigration paperwork

Then 4 fucking trains & six fucking hours to get back to Cambridge.

[Dodgy69]

Electric hand dryers in toilets that are too high up the wall.