Jokes Thread

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Felix
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Felix »

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Taipan
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Taipan »

Went swimming today. Needed a piss badly so went to the deep end. Lifeguard noticed and blew his whistle so loud I nearly fell in!
Felix
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Felix »

I just said "No comment" all the way through the police interview.
I didn't get the job.
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Horse
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Horse »

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Even bland can be a type of character :wave:
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Yambo
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Yambo »

***Breaking news!***

A 9 year old girl has disappeared after using moisturising cream that makes you look 10 years younger.
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Taipan
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Taipan »

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Yorick
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Yorick »

One for @gremlin
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Felix
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Felix »

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JackyJoll
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by JackyJoll »

Saga Lout wrote: Sat Mar 02, 2024 10:48 am
Horse wrote: Sat Mar 02, 2024 9:57 am My mate drinks brake fluid. Lots of brake fluid, every day.

I think he's addicted.

He says he can stop anytime he wants.
Is anybody going to get upset if I say he's probably retarded?
That’s discrespectful.
Saga Lout
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Saga Lout »

JackyJoll wrote: Fri Mar 15, 2024 8:14 am
Saga Lout wrote: Sat Mar 02, 2024 10:48 am
Horse wrote: Sat Mar 02, 2024 9:57 am My mate drinks brake fluid. Lots of brake fluid, every day.

I think he's addicted.

He says he can stop anytime he wants.
Is anybody going to get upset if I say he's probably retarded?
That’s discrespectful.
Two weeks, You is well slow innit. :lol:
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by JackyJoll »

Saga Lout wrote: Fri Mar 15, 2024 9:10 am
JackyJoll wrote: Fri Mar 15, 2024 8:14 am
Saga Lout wrote: Sat Mar 02, 2024 10:48 am

Is anybody going to get upset if I say he's probably retarded?
That’s discrespectful.
Two weeks, You is well slow innit. :lol:
Yes I should have been here on the dot 3.
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Taipan
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Taipan »

Rearrange these 3 to make words.

1. PNEIS 2. BUTTSXE 3. TSSOER
Spoiler
Hopefully you got Spine, Subtext and Stores...
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Felix »

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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Taipan »

They say that during sex you burn off as many calories as running 8 miles.
Who the hell runs 8 miles in 15 seconds! :crazy:
Felix
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Re: Jokes Thread

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Horse
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Horse »

Felix wrote: Sun Mar 24, 2024 10:21 am 434019254_907502384450750_3569009106766262288_n.jpg
From a covid warning poster during early 2020
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Even bland can be a type of character :wave:
Felix
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Felix »

Never mind bumming the chicken that shit swinging the clever has cut four of the woman's fingers off :shock:
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Saga Lout »

Felix wrote: Sun Mar 24, 2024 11:01 am Never mind bumming the chicken that shit swinging the clever has cut four of the woman's fingers off :shock:
Erm...three. Unless you think she's from Norfolk.
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by Horse »

Or she's left-handed and holding a small pistol?
Even bland can be a type of character :wave:
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Re: Jokes Thread

Post by 636mick »

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