Best comedy one-liner?

[KungFooBob]

I'm still waiting to use my special one liner.

All I need is someone to cry in front of me, then I can ask them...

"Are you crying because of your haircut?"

[Horse]

More of a put down. From FJSrider/Voyager/Thermo/etc.

"I expect you rinse and repeat"

[Jody]

A colleague in the garage, looked at me, patted his belly and said

" I can see you've had a good summer "

I could NOT resist

" Well mate, every time I fuck your mum, she gives me a cookie "

[David]

Mine..
People say " shorts? Your'e brave!"

My response is " I would look silly without them"

[Count Steer]

A colleague in the garage, looked at me, patted his belly and said

" I can see you've had a good summer "

I could NOT resist

" Well mate, every time I fuck your mum, she gives me a cookie "

A slight variation on Shane Warnes version.

[Yorick]

[Yorick]

[Yorick]

Did you hear about the bloke who poisoned his wife with a razor blade?

He gave her arse a nick