What have you done today thread?

[Greenman]

Likely i would of got up in his face and ordered him to pay for another meal and at least a pint for being such a tool, and would of taken it from there.

[Greenman]

Was this Yorkshire Pudding pincher a mate or known acquaintance?

If yes then I'd have taken the hump and quietly let him know it wasn't on to fuck about with my food, if no and it was just some random dickhead then I'd have taken his jaw off with a left cross (which I practice like mad and to be fair is a cracker).

These days I'm not that arsed about consequences from the law, even if it ended up a GBH charge it'd only be Cat C, low culp, 24 months bird (out in twelve) - I could do that standing on my head in todays jail.

I have a mate that is in and out of jail, he normally gets out fucks around for 6 months or so until he runs out of money and then does something to go back in as in his words "i have a better standard of living in jail"! - it's little more than an occupational hazard for him!

Doesn't really make it much of a deterrent really eh!

[Noggin]

Started work today!!

DAMN - a whole day (including lunch!) of very fast french! My brain is melting out my ears at the mo! And I'll be in bed way earlier than normal this evening!! LOL

But, I think it was good. Need a bit of time to settle in, but my new colleague is great and I think will be easy to work with. A bit older than the last one and so has more idea of work (she'll not going to spend all day on her phone and just a little time actually working!! LOL)

Tomorrow is a half day as I have to go to a doctor's appointment in Chambery in the afternoon - here's hoping the Monster behaves. Although I can't find the clear pocket for the mini tankbag so looks like I'll be printing out the directions and hoping I remember it as I go along!!

[Pirahna]

Just to update the saga of the yorkshire pudding. I've been in the pub before but not for a few years, I just happen to be staying across the road while I'm in the UK. I've never seen the bloke before. The short version, he finished up on the floor and I left.

As the half eaten yorkshire appeared back on the plate the story unfolded a bit quicker than drunk bloke had probably bargained for. As I was getting up I said "are you fucking paying for that"? I put my hand under his chin, moved his head back, he took a backward step to compensate and I kicked his front leg from under him and he sat on the floor. He looked totally surprised. The barman was there fairly sharpish, I said to drunk bloke "if you want to get your hands in my dinner and eat it, you can fucking pay for it". I picked up my stuff from the table and left.

Fin.

[Silly Car]

Just to update the saga of the yorkshire pudding. I've been in the pub before but not for a few years, I just happen to be staying across the road while I'm in the UK. I've never seen the bloke before. The short version, he finished up on the floor and I left.

As the half eaten yorkshire appeared back on the plate the story unfolded a bit quicker than drunk bloke had probably bargained for. As I was getting up I said "are you fucking paying for that"? I put my hand under his chin, moved his head back, he took a backward step to compensate and I kicked his front leg from under him and he sat on the floor. He looked totally surprised. The barman was there fairly sharpish, I said to drunk bloke "if you want to get your hands in my dinner and eat it, you can fucking pay for it". I picked up my stuff from the table and left.

Fin.

Probably best outcome as the drunk ended up on his arse without too much effort and should plod get involved, easily passed off as helping him to the floor as he fell

[ZRX61]

Was about the head out the door to go to a Dr's place for a treadmill stress test. Phone rang as I picked it up, cancelled until Wednesday @4.30m.

[ZRX61]

Not my finest hour, I'm now really pissed off.

Late Sunday roast, I'm in the pub now, pissed bloke decided it would be great fun to take the Yorkshire pudding from my plate, stuff most of it into his mouth and put back what was left. Despite being told to fuck off he didn't, he stood there and grinned at me, what would you have done?

Throat punch so the fucker chokes on the puddin', kick in the taters & if he bends over from that impact, 2nd kick would be centered in his chest.
If he doesn't bend over from having his taters mashed, grab his throat, right leg behind his right leg & sweep the fucker onto his arse being sure to put my other hand behind his head so he doesn't get a fractured skull from hitting the ground. Possibly follow up with enough kicks to the kidneys so he pisses blood for a fortnight.

I loikes my yorkshires.

[cheb]

I'd have quietly left with no fuss, drunks aren't worth bothering with and probably won't learn however the lesson is delivered.

So far two loads of washing and started emptying the van from my trip away.

[Mr. Dazzle]

It's a shame you can't get them to write 500 lines of "I will not steal other people's yorkies" once sobered up. That might actually sink in.

[KungFooBob]

Wife has an event in Buxton this morning.

Last night I ask her what time is she setting off, she says the normal time. She works four miles from home, it takes her 10mins max. Google maps says that at that time to get to Buxton from our house could be anywhere between 1.5-2 hours. Now she's pissed off that she has to get up two hours earlier.

This morning, just before I leave for work I ask her if she wants to take my Volvo as the satnav is more up to date and and gives better directions on the drivers display. The response "Why on earth would I want to drive your car?".

Half way to work I get a phone call. "How do I get the satnav to work in my car?"

She's set off from home, late. Hasn't entered the destination in the satnav and wants to do it on the fly, she's never used the satnav before.

The car has a rotary controller, it spins, works as a joystick and as a big button if you press it.

Once you've selected NAV from the top menu, you pull the knob down/to the rear of the car to pull up the bottom menu with the option to set destination.

I explain to her four times how to use the knob. She then tells me it's not working as the knob has come off in her hand.

It's an SL class Mercedes. You need to be Geoff Capes to pull that knob off. Stupid Woman!

[MingtheMerciless]

Worked a night shift, then had a row on the train on the way home.

Get on train, lean my bike against the bike rail and start dozing off, then some idiot gets on and drops his clunker of a bike on mine at which point I have a bit of a go as one of his pedals is bending one of my wheel spokes. He then repositions his bike and bungees it to the bike rail, as he wanders off I notice this means his pannier carrier is leaning very hard on my carbon fibre fork (bad) so I get up to rearrange the bikes so mine isn’t being squashed at which point the idiot returns and moves his bike to the other bike bay on the other side of the vestibule that doesn’t have any bikes in it. Then I notice the woman opposite me scowling at me and as I take me ear phones out I’m being told “you need to get some perspective it’s only a bike, there are people dying in Israel at the moment and I have family there sheltering from the attacks”. Having just rolled off a night shift I wasn’t in the mood to have a debate so I was very rude and she moved in a huff. FFS what’s some idiots carelessness damaging my bike got to do with you.

[Cousin Jack]

I'd have quietly left with no fuss, drunks aren't worth bothering with and probably won't learn however the lesson is delivered.

That ^ , and pick my pubs more carefully in future.

[Noggin]

I rode approximately 145 miles today. Mostly at between 70-80 mph - cos it was quickest route and least need of sat nav (since I don't have a holder and couldn't find the clear pocket to attach the phone to the tank bag )

Very very proud of the Monster - she did good. Weirdly, she very rarely seems to 'want' top gear, but I'm going by the engine as no rev counter!! But mostly if she went into top, the whole feel of the bike was "aaarrgghhhh, nooooooo" so I'd go back down one!! LOL And actually she seems pretty economical. Well, maybe not, but around 10 miles to a litre. More per litre after she'd been thrashed on the autoroute Proper happy about that!!

For me, I have some very hurty muscles!! Mostly at the points the deltoid 'fixes' to other places, but my left arm aches - it seems I'm compensating a bit!

Last time I went in that direction, I used the back roads, so didn't really notice any buffeting, but damn, there's a lot of buffeting when there's other traffic around!!


But - tired, happy, good appointment had in Chambèry (no need to argue for the meds I wanted, she was totally happy to write the prescription for exactly what I wanted for the next year ) and now home to collapse on the sofa with a pizza then early night!!

[Felix]

45/46 to the gallon if you did your sums right. Cant be that bad. Has it got the right size sprockets?

[Noggin]

45/46 to the gallon if you did your sums right. Cant be that bad. Has it got the right size sprockets?

I'm not great at sums!! But, I did 48 miles and got 4.8 litres in it, then 72 miles and got 6.2 litres in (the 72 miles was 98% on the autoroute ) !! I didn't try and convert that to mpg, so cheers


I have no idea what the right sprockets are or what's on there!! But they will stay for now Once I get the certificate to register it here I'll change the chain and sprockets and the tyres!!! To start!

[Felix]

4.54lt to the gallon. Think your 2nd run worked out at just over 52mpg. your average 120 miles is 49.79mpg

[Noggin]

4.54lt to the gallon. Think your 2nd run worked out at just over 52mpg. your average 120 miles is 49.79mpg

That's pretty cool!! She definitely sounds better now she's had a serious run out - locally I hit 70mph occasionally, but never for long!! It was about an hour of 70-80 each way today!!

[KungFooBob]

UPDATE:

The silly cow pulled the volume knob off the radio, she wasn't even trying to use the fucking media controller by the gear change!!!

Also, it turns out the she got the wrong day. The event is actually on Thursday.

God help me!

[Noggin]

UPDATE:

The silly cow pulled the volume knob off the radio, she wasn't even trying to use the fucking media controller by the gear change!!!

Also, it turns out the she got the wrong day. The event is actually on Thursday.

God help me!

Woohooo - you get to do all this again on Thursday!!

[Taipan]

UPDATE:

The silly cow pulled the volume knob off the radio, she wasn't even trying to use the fucking media controller by the gear change!!!

Also, it turns out the she got the wrong day. The event is actually on Thursday.

God help me!

At least you can now give her a SAt Nav tutorial!