Depression

[ZRX61]

Met a guy yesterday who helped me step back from the ledge about 12 years ago. Discovered I had some shit buried that I didn't know I'd buried. Was a real rollercoaster for an hour or so.

[MrLongbeard]

After speaking to the Trainee Psychological Wellbeing Practitioner for an hour, filling in the questionnaire they'd sent along with some rather uncomfortable questions, my starting point is moderately severe levels of depression and severe levels of anxiety.

Now on a 12 week waiting list for telephone based CBT which by my reckoning will be a waste of time as I'm convinced my headfuckery is seasonal, but GP reckons I should crack on with it and see it I can develop coping strategies, I'm not convinced but seeing as I'm now in the system will see how it plays out.

8 or so weeks later, another questionnaire and "yeah we can't help you as you score pretty normal now, go and look at our CBT website"
Still, I got a nice letter 3 days later explaining how / why they're rebranding with a catchy new name and tag lines yep that'll be my tax money hard at work for me.

[the_priest]

Daughter has a change of meds coming up. Hope to collect prescription tomorrow. Also having a full blood work test done so to eliminate any physical issues. She could not get up today, hoping she can tomorrow. ASD/ADHS assessment is two weeks or so away now, so something to look forward to.

[Yorick]

Daughter has a change of meds coming up. Hope to collect prescription tomorrow. Also having a full blood work test done so to eliminate any physical issues. She could not get up today, hoping she can tomorrow. ASD/ADHS assessment is two weeks or so away now, so something to look forward to.

Sometimes it's emotional and physical.
Does faith help sometimes as can give positive mental attitude.

[the_priest]

Daughter has a change of meds coming up. Hope to collect prescription tomorrow. Also having a full blood work test done so to eliminate any physical issues. She could not get up today, hoping she can tomorrow. ASD/ADHS assessment is two weeks or so away now, so something to look forward to.

Sometimes it's emotional and physical.
Does faith help sometimes as can give positive mental attitude.

Well her autism has magnified the depression, the meds are not helping as much as expected. She does not really have faith (she used to) and so that is something her mum and I rely on.

[the_priest]

Took daughter for her ASD/ADHS assessment today. They said at the end of the day that she is definitely on the spectrum and their report will reflect this. It will play into her dealing with depression, which may well be autism exhaustion (dealing with socially difficult situations leaving her shattered). So there is light, however dim, shining in the tunnel.

[Yambo]

My son would have celebrated his 48th birthday yesterday, possibly with an engagement announcement although I think that would have been a month or two earlier. It wasn't a good day for me, lots of "happy heavenly birthday" messages on social media and I don't do that shit. I also tried to sort out an issue for later in the month* and was dealing with idiots.

Round at M's last night the frustration and simple annoyance of the day(and previous days) caught up with me and turned into an angry outburst. I think M got a bit scared and although she wasn't in any danger my anger was unforgivable. I should have stayed at home of course but too late for that. She's worried for me (but doesn't really need to be) but it was all OK this morning. I've not been in a good place the last few days, still procrastinating, but improving.

* I'm going to a star party on the top of a big hill in 10 days time (it's a sort of astronomy outreach event) and I'm taking a friend along. Sorting accommodation out for him is getting to be a right pain - he's partially disabled following a stroke about 10 years ago and while I'll just take my tent, getting in and out of it can be a struggle for me and will be very difficult for him. Tents are available to hire apparently but getting people to tell me the design so that I can tell if they are suitable is proving very frustrating.

The sun is shining outside. Summer has arrived, a month later than normal and the village has been full of Turkish tourists for bayram. The huge influx of people has effects on our part of the village. More frustrations (easing now, thankfully), I'd hoped the economical situation would keep the numbers down but no such luck.

[Felix]

Daughter has a change of meds coming up. Hope to collect prescription tomorrow. Also having a full blood work test done so to eliminate any physical issues. She could not get up today, hoping she can tomorrow. ASD/ADHS assessment is two weeks or so away now, so something to look forward to.

Wife has had med changes a few times over the years. Not a happy place as the body weans off one lot and onto another. Just had almost four good years with no psychiatric help or CPN. We cant fathom the trigger but its all tits up again and waiting on a psychiatrist appointment and no doubt weekly CPN visits again. Probably another med change also.

[dern]

Struggling at the moment although not quite at the depressed stage I've been at in the past. Feel like a cog in the machine at work but wife has lost her job recently so feel completely trapped. Waiting on a slot for an autism assessment which I was inspired to do while helping my daughter with hers last year and finding out we're more or less the same in our thinking which might help explain things. The lack of caring in society really gets me down along with everything on the news that I now try to avoid. Trying to bottom out the way I feel by focussing on learning the bass (a new instrument to me) but the worst thing for me is the perceived lack of choices in life due to financial responsibilities... no debt, just responsibilities.

[Buckaroo]

Struggling at the moment although not quite at the depressed stage I've been at in the past. Feel like a cog in the machine at work but wife has lost her job recently so feel completely trapped. Waiting on a slot for an autism assessment which I was inspired to do while helping my daughter with hers last year and finding out we're more or less the same in our thinking which might help explain things. The lack of caring in society really gets me down along with everything on the news that I now try to avoid. Trying to bottom out the way I feel by focussing on learning the bass (a new instrument to me) but the worst thing for me is the perceived lack of choices in life due to financial responsibilities... no debt, just responsibilities.

Yes, it feels like work controls you and not the other way around. Horrible feeling. Society has never cared, but family does and often gets you through. Music is cathartic and can really help. Good luck

[Noggin]

Daughter has a change of meds coming up. Hope to collect prescription tomorrow. Also having a full blood work test done so to eliminate any physical issues. She could not get up today, hoping she can tomorrow. ASD/ADHS assessment is two weeks or so away now, so something to look forward to.

Wife has had med changes a few times over the years. Not a happy place as the body weans off one lot and onto another. Just had almost four good years with no psychiatric help or CPN. We cant fathom the trigger but its all tits up again and waiting on a psychiatrist appointment and no doubt weekly CPN visits again. Probably another med change also.

Has she looked at hormone levels and effects of imbalance? x

[Noggin]

I've tried to write on this thread so many times in the last few weeks. I went from a winter where I finally thought I was getting on top of life and could see the end of the tunnel to the realisation it really was just another train - a few of them I think. Universe well and truly got its bat out again.

But I'm not giving up. I am sitting in a corner rocking a lot. Probably in the worst place in a long time. But, I refuse to give up. It's just all so much more difficult doing this crap solo

[Tomcat]

I never really got all this. I just thought, "It can't be all bad, have a beer, go for a ride." Until I caught just a small bit of it. Work was getting on top of me, I was flogging my guts out, things were going wrong and I felt the finger was being pointed at me for a corporate joint effort fuckup. I turned to brooding on it and got to the point where I didn't want to get out be ed, let alone go to work and have to face all the BS again and again.

Took a day's leave and went to see the GP, she spotted straight away I needed time out from what was getting me down and gave me a sicknote to do just that. I couldn't really relax as I knew the shit was still rumbling downhill at work, but it gave me a breather and time to think about what I needed to do. I stepped aside from my old role and within a matter of months had found another job that was basically my dream job.

So I was lucky. Work related stress knocked me for six but didn't take me into the bottomless pit of clinical depression, I didn't need drugs and I was able to find a way out with help. Scared fuck out of me though and would never want to go back there again.

[Docca]

The perception of self-worth plays an important hand in the dealing with/recovering from work related stress/depression.

The challenge many of us will go through is the normalisation of poor workplace cultures. There is a boiling frogs comment to make here- but the importance of your personal integrity and drive to make a positive difference should remain. Much easier said than done and I know more people than not who put up with shitty working conditions to put food on the table.

I’ve not read the thread properly (which is lazy!) but re: meds changes. I’d be much happier to engage in conversations about changes in medicine once a psychological formulation has occurred as part of a comprehensive assessment. That means more than the GAD-7 or PHQ-9 you’ll get from a GP.

[Potter]

It's worth mentioning that work can still be very stressful even if it's a good environment and not toxic, etc.
If one has a lot of responsibility then it can simply be very stressful to manage if you take those responsibilities seriously.

If you add that into the mix with a busy family, kids, etc, then it can be massive, even if everyone is nice and the company is a good one.

In fact, that can be when it gets you, when everything seems to be going ok, no particular reasons... then wham.

[Ant]

I remember in TRC, there was a 'Morning Check In' thread, people found it useful for saying hello or what ever, I'm having coffee, it helped out some who were suffering who just wanted something really general to say hello. Seeing something similar on another forum and seeing this thread just reminded me of that thread in TRC.

[Noggin]

It's worth mentioning that work can still be very stressful even if it's a good environment and not toxic, etc.
If one has a lot of responsibility then it can simply be very stressful to manage if you take those responsibilities seriously.

If you add that into the mix with a busy family, kids, etc, then it can be massive, even if everyone is nice and the company is a good one.

In fact, that can be when it gets you, when everything seems to be going ok, no particular reasons... then wham.

Often going home alone with no one to talk to, moan at, laugh with or just get a hug from is as bad. I have a mate here that lives alone, but with his dog. I maintain that living alone is much easier with a pet - you don't feel nearly as daft chatting away to a cat or dog as you do talking to the wall (a la Shirley Valentine!).

I miss having a cat for lots of reasons. But someone to talk to/at and get a hug/cuddle from are two of the biggest reasons. If I didn't live on the first floor (and in an apartment too small for a cat to live indoors only) I'd have adopted one as much for my mental health as to help a stray/rescue cat. I know - selfish. But I would love it lots too! So not 100% selfish!!

[David]

Cats.....best meds in the world..........

[Bike Breaker]

Cats.....best meds in the world..........

Especially if you have low blood pressure and one of the neighbours' cats deposits sloppy stinky yellow poo about 5 times a week in your garden.

My blood pressure's excellent but I still get the poo deposits.

[David]

I am actually quite concerned for the cat....the poo shouldn't be yellow or sloppy...and a healthy cat will bury it.
Of course, it could be fox poo.