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Jokes Thread
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Demannu
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Demannu
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Taipan
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Felix
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Skub
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Re: Jokes Thread
"Be kind to past versions of yourself that didn't know what you know now."
Walt Whitman
https://soundcloud.com/skub1955
Walt Whitman
https://soundcloud.com/skub1955
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Mr. Dazzle
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Horse
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mangocrazy
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Re: Jokes Thread
It is that time of year, after all...
There is no cloud, just somebody else's computer.
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mangocrazy
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Mussels
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mangocrazy
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Re: Jokes Thread
What is this 'good racism' of which ye speak?
There is no cloud, just somebody else's computer.
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Taipan
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Re: Jokes Thread
A local Farmer has successfully grown a field of vibrators! Unfortunately, he now has a problem with squatters!
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Taipan
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Demannu
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Taipan
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Taipan
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Yorick
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Re: Jokes Thread
Two scousers are riding along the M62 from Manchester to Liverpool on a motorbike. They break down and start hitching a lift. A friendly trucker stops and the scousers ask him for a lift.
He tells them he has no room in the wagon as he is carrying 20,000 bowling balls but will take a look at the bike for them. He tries everything he knows but is unable to repair it. Time is getting on now and he's late for his delivery so he tells the scousers he has to leave.
"Can ya gissa lift then..?" they ask. The trucker again explains that he has no room as he is carrying 20,000 bowling balls. The scousers put it to the driver that if they can manage to fit in the back will he take them and he agrees.
They manage to squeeze themselves and their motorbike into the back of the wagon, so the driver shuts the doors and sets off. By now he's really late and puts his foot down. Soon a patrol car from Greater Manchester Police pulls him over for speeding.
The officer asks the driver what he is carrying, to which he replies..... "Scouse eggs".
Not surprisingly the copper isn't impressed and asks to take a look in the back. He opens the back door, then quickly slams it shut and locks it. Face as white as a sheet, he gets on his radio and requests for immediate backup from as many officers as possible. The dispatcher asks what emergency he has that requires so many officers......
"I pulled over a wagon with 20,000 Scouse eggs in it - two have hatched and the thieving bastards have already nicked a motorbike"
He tells them he has no room in the wagon as he is carrying 20,000 bowling balls but will take a look at the bike for them. He tries everything he knows but is unable to repair it. Time is getting on now and he's late for his delivery so he tells the scousers he has to leave.
"Can ya gissa lift then..?" they ask. The trucker again explains that he has no room as he is carrying 20,000 bowling balls. The scousers put it to the driver that if they can manage to fit in the back will he take them and he agrees.
They manage to squeeze themselves and their motorbike into the back of the wagon, so the driver shuts the doors and sets off. By now he's really late and puts his foot down. Soon a patrol car from Greater Manchester Police pulls him over for speeding.
The officer asks the driver what he is carrying, to which he replies..... "Scouse eggs".
Not surprisingly the copper isn't impressed and asks to take a look in the back. He opens the back door, then quickly slams it shut and locks it. Face as white as a sheet, he gets on his radio and requests for immediate backup from as many officers as possible. The dispatcher asks what emergency he has that requires so many officers......
"I pulled over a wagon with 20,000 Scouse eggs in it - two have hatched and the thieving bastards have already nicked a motorbike"
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Docca
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Felix
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