Potter wrote: ↑Tue Mar 22, 2022 8:22 am
I got fed up with letters in the post deciding my future.
But they did still decide your future as you decided to study, learn, work more hours and push yourself up the ranks into higher management. So even though they didn't influence your decisions in the way they used to, they still directly decided your future....
Mmmmmmm. Deep.
You're right, but only because I'm arrogant, if I'd listened to people then I could have done all this in my twenties instead of working my arse off doing it the hard way. Like I said before, I wish someone had forced me to listen to what I know now, or even just given me a decent enough heads up that I had a look at it instead of just grafting away.
That's life though fella... If i had done many many things in my past completely different... then i'd be a completely different person anyway and likely none of this would matter. But as humans we 'learn' as time goes on and we make mistakes, some big, some small. Even if someone wise had given me all the advice on the planet, i'd have still done the things that meant i ended up less rich than i could have.
But i'm me, that's what makes me me... so... it's all good.
I put money away every month in a stocks and shares ISA for Baby D, I also put a chunk of my annual bonus in there (assuming I get it!) for her every year. There is actually a 'kids ISA' thing which gives some perks, but crucially said child automatically gets access to it when they're 18. There's no way in hell I'd give an 18 year old free access to five or six figures (depending on how the markets do ), so I'm keeping it all in my name and just earmarking it for her.
That's the one - crucially it's on top of your own £20k annual limit. However, bluntly, that's not a limit which poses any problems for me It did when I had a windfall, but not any more!
Greenman wrote: I never said they did. I was just making the point that the people that actually do the menial work that you probably take for granted every day are the ones that keep the world turning.
So what? Same goes for any job, or it wouldn’t be a job.
And why do you think that I probably take more for granted than you do?
Potter wrote: ↑Tue Mar 22, 2022 8:44 am
I work with someone that just had their first kid, they've put some money in an S&P500 tracker and (no word of a lie) have bought them a Rolex watch to open for their 18th or 21st birthday (the kid is a couple of months old) - that's going to be a hell of a start for a kid leaving Uni.
Good call with the Rolex. By the time the kid's 21 it'll probably still be tradeable for a bag of flour*
* After the next couple of pandemics, the food wars and the dying nuclear spasms of the fading running dog capitalist, imperialist lackeys and their brutal autocratic opponents. (Maybe put a gun, hazmat suit and a dosimeter in the package?).
(OTOH, he may just get a nice watch ).
Doubt is not a pleasant condition.
But certainty is an absurd one.
Voltaire
I'm a bit sceptical of people making arrangements to provide for their kids' future.
The opposite view is to provide them with a decent work ethic.
It's not a simple black and white thing though as it's quite possible that your kids could grow up to dislike you and resent the leg up you're giving them. I have two sons, one decided a few years ago that he wanted nothing (or very little) to do with his father and brother. The other one is fine and like me is saddened by his brother's attitude. I didn't give them a financial leg up when they were starting out but instead instilled in them that you should work for what you want.
A friend of mine wants me to help him make a boat for his son. I said I'd help on one condition, that his son helps too and learns techniques and how to use tools properly. Doing stuff for yourself gives things far more value than being gifted them, I think.
I could be wrong of course. My own two sons could be evidence of that but then again, it's not a simple thing as people and personalities are involved
That is a big part of the reason I have not set up a Junior ISA for baby D, with that she would receive the money no matter what I say.
The way I'm doing it means that I get the final say of if/when she gets a leg up.
But say she becomes heart surgeon, the youngest ever doctor to perform a transplant, squeezing her education in between her Olympic snowboard practice and Astronaut training. It'd be nice to help her out then right, and it's not like you can go back 25 years and start saving.
Yambo wrote: ↑Tue Mar 22, 2022 11:23 am
I'm a bit sceptical of people making arrangements to provide for their kids' future.
The opposite view is to provide them with a decent work ethic.
A work ethic means different things to different people - it doesn't necessarily correlate positively or negatively with money, because if it did then either one of us could argue ours is better based on what we're worth.
I could type a lot about this, it's interesting.
Our kids have work ethics in different directions but I wouldn't fuck with the youngest two, they're way more driven than me and those are the two that had it easiest because they grew up when we were doing ok in life.
We all get to do parenting the best way we see fit, but I don't get the pride that some people have of watching their kids struggle to get along in life just for the satisfaction of making them struggle as much as they did. Surely it makes sense to create as many options and choices as you can. My lad might end up in the infantry next to someone that didn't have many choices in life, but he will have chosen that path, rather than be limited to it.
If you're typing away on this forum then you've probably done ok in life and we're pontificating on self-actualisation, but ask someone from a poor background if they wished they'd had more choices about what to do when they left school at sixteen.
Unlike you (I guess) I don't know anyone who takes pride in watching their kids struggle to get on in life.
Of course a work ethic means different things to different people, just as success and happiness mean different things to different people. They're subjective. Whether or not I've done well is also subjective.
I don't think there are many pontificating on self-actualisation and I don't have to ask anyone from a poor background about their choices when they were 16 because I am from a relatively poor background (my father was a railway porter on Dover docks and my mother did some cleaning work for people despite having a heart problem that killed her when I was 16) and I had limited choices at 16. I'm sure I'm not the only one. If you or anyone else think I've done well in life I thank you. Personally I think I've done OK but looking back maybe I shouldn't have left school at 16 with no qualifications but should have stayed at school, gone to uni and later, discovered a cure for pancreatic cancer. Of course, that different path would probably meant I wouldn't have met the woman that I wanted to save from an early death (from pancreatic cancer).
Life is what you make it Potter. You're doing it your way and others will do it their way. If consistently telling people that they could of course do it all better is a result of the way you've done it then to be honest I think my own way and others' ways may be better.
Yambo wrote: ↑Tue Mar 22, 2022 2:42 pm
Life is what you make it Potter. You're doing it your way and others will do it their way. If consistently telling people that they could of course do it all better is a result of the way you've done it then to be honest I think my own way and others' ways may be better.
As you say, there is not one way, there are many, but I have always considered that a good education provides a good start in life. Not only because of facts and techniques you learn, but because most importantly you learn how to learn and re-evaluate. Be open minded to change.
My children are different to me so my path in life can not be the one chosen by them. And even if they are similar to me (as one is), circumstances and opportunities are not the same so his path is different to mine.
Financially I have treated my (4) children the same. And they all know it.
"Truth does not change because it is, or is not, believed by a majority of the people." - Giordano Bruno
), so I'm keeping it all in my name and just earmarking it for her.
).
